


The Pimp of Playa Vista - {y.kh × l.mh × i.ch}

by smoshyphantrash



Category: Day6 (Band), Monsta X (Band), NCT (Band), Red Velvet (K-pop Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Prostitution, Brothels, Businessmen, Character Death, Child Abuse, Drug Abuse, Drug Addiction, Drug Use, Drugged Sex, Drugs, F/M, Gen, Illegal Activities, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Mentioned Seo Youngho | Johnny, Minor Character Death, Multi, Other, Past Sexual Abuse, Prostitution, Semi-Public Sex, Sexual Abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-03
Updated: 2019-03-13
Packaged: 2019-05-17 16:00:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply, Underage
Chapters: 24
Words: 36,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14835405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smoshyphantrash/pseuds/smoshyphantrash
Summary: None of them planned to end up like this. Minhyuk had bills to pay for and Changkyun needed a place to stay. They didn't plan to sell themselves to get where they needed to go. And Mr. Yoo Kihyun didn't expect to be a monumental business mogel by day and a scummy pimp daddy by night.None of them planned to fall in love with people while doing this either.





	1. × one ×

**Author's Note:**

> READ ALL TAGS FIRST AND DO NOT READ JUST TO COMPLAIN ABOUT WHAT I AM WRITING. THANK YOU.

"Joohyun!" I called out of my office. "Did you email Mr. Park those documents I asked you to?" I sighed, writing down some information as I began a new proposal.

My secretary walked into my office, skirt tight around her hips, half blazer cupping her chest perfectly. I bit lip as I glanced her up and down. "Yes, Mr. Yoo, sir..." She smiled. "But please, do call me Irene."

I nodded, holding my hands up a bit. "Well, Irene. Would you be as so kind as to close my door?" I asked. She smiled and did so and started to walk my way. "Ah," I stopped her. "Lock it too." Irene did so before coming to my desk.

"Mr. Yoo, what's going on?" She asked softly.

I shook my head. "Don't act clueless and come here and read what Daddy's working on." I moved my chair back a bit, enough for her to sit on my lap. "I need help with this proposal, it's driving me crazy and it's due in two days."

Irene sat down, reading over what I had to propose. "You can start with statistics, and then talk about how your approach will work." Her smile was a gorgeous one.

I bit my lip slightly. "Thanks, love..." I kissed her hand softly. "Now, go home. Relax. I'll be by your place, hopefully around five tomorrow morning." I let her stand up. "Does that sound like a plan?" Irene shrugged softly.

"I mean," she sighed. "Why don't you ever come before the next morning? Ever? We've never gone on a date and we've been together since you hired me, three months ago. I'm tired of hiding Kihyun..." Irene folded her arms, pouting at me.

I sighed, standing up. "I can't risk being seen with you, Irene..." I felt bad about it but didn't show it. "This is even a risk here with you now. People stare. And if I'm seen with you, both of our jobs will be gone." It was that point when Irene began laughing.

The way she laughed meant trouble. I felt it in my bones. "Well, Kihyun," Irene said. "Start treating me like your girlfriend and keep your job, or get an HR report filed on you for sexual harrassment and kiss it goodbye." She walked to the door, leaving me dumbfounded.

"You can't do that to me, Princess," I said. She just opened the door and walked out. "Great," I mumbled to myself. "Now I've got this to worry about." Irene was strong but she wouldn't do it. I didn't worry too much about it. 

I came home later and set all my work on my desk before going to change. It was almost time to go back to work. Sundown was coming around. I changed from my clean and pristine suit to a darker outfit, the outfit I wore for the dirty business. My phone began ringing and I already knew what it was. "You've skipped the past week, you're not getting let the fuck up tonight."

I heard the exhausted sigh and rolled my eyes. "I have... Been running all fucking day, making sure my baby gets well. I cannot keep leaving her in the middle of the night with her uncle. I can't. Please... Let me off tonight. She's sick." I shook my head before remembering he couldn't see me.

"Tell you what, Minhyuk..." I packed up my bag for tonight's work. "I'll let you off tonight." I could hear the smile on his face.

Minhyuk sighed a sigh of relief. "Yes! Thank you! I-I'll take Taeyong's customers for the next week."

I shook my head again, "Ah ah..." I smiled softly. "Let me finish. I'll let you off if Jae can pay me the $160,000 you cost me this past week," I said, checking the time.

"If he could fucking do that, I wouldn't be working for you, the fuck?" Minhyuk snapped at me.

I scoffed. "Do you remember who the fuck you're talking to?" I asked. "The same motherfucker that could have you killed if you rub me the wrong way."

Minhyuk went quiet for a bit. "I-I'm sorry, Daddy..." He mumbled.

"Watch your pretty little mouth, Minhyuk..." I threw another bottle of alcohol in my bag. "You know where to go, baby. Be more like Changkyun. He's a better whore than you and you've been doing this longer." I sighed softly. "Get it together. See you later." Before he could say anything, I hung up.

I double checked the bag. When it comes to my dirty work, I have a constant stream of obsessive behaviors. Drugs, check. Booze, check. Condoms, check. Everything looked like it was there. I knew that I for sure had Minhyuk, Jooheon and Changkyun working for me tonight. Taeyong was a maybe, I urged him to go on leave but he was always one to please me. Brian was coming to help me keep everyone in order. I sighed softly as I left my mansion and jumping in my other car, driving into Compton. 

I got to the house I had there and everyone was there. Minhyuk, looking extremely sullen, shaking his leg and checking his phone. Changkyun, putting on his entire flirty demeanor, even though he didn't have to use it on me. Jooheon, sitting and waiting for his assignment. He was pretty new, so Minhyuk, Brian and I were still teaching him things. Taeyong was even here and I honestly contemplated sending him on his way. He was not in any shape at all to be doing this. He was really sick and didn't need to be in this life. I gave him his way out. Taeyong was quite... weak in a way. 

Changkyun spoke up first when he saw me. "Brian's trying to get out of date night," he said. I nodded a bit. Everyone greeted me except for Minhyuk.

"Minhyuk," I said sternly.

He looked up at me. "Oh, yes, hello, sir." I rolled my eyes softly. He got a call and answered it right in front of me. "Jae? What's wrong?" I raised my eyebrow as to question why he was talking to anyone on the job. He looked up at me and put his phone on mute. "She won't sleep without me... Please, Kihyun, please let me go tonight..." 

I walked toward him slowly before kneeling in front of him and glaring him in the eyes. I grabbed his face roughly. "Have Jae give me my fucking money..." I got closer to his face, gripping it tighter. "Or let her fucking cry herself to sleep." Minhyuk frowned softly as I threw his face away from me.

He unmuted his call. "Jae, I can't okay? Not right now. Give her some soup with stars. She likes that a lot." Minhyuk hung up quickly and sighed.

"Phone." I held my hand out for it. He placed his phone in my hand. "Despicable... I oughta fucking throw you out of here and make your life a living hell."

He mumbled something under his breath... Something that sounded a lot like "It's already there." I glared back at him, but he didn't say anything again.

Brian came into the house, sighing a bit. "Okay, I have jobs for Changkyun and Minhyuk. Seven places, 45 minutes each, three for Changkyun, three for Minhyuk, one for the both of them and about 2,000 for each." I sighed a bit. Nowhere near a start to all the money I lost from Minhyuk.

"Whatever..." I opened up my bag. "Minhyuk, you got a vein to spare? Can't have your nose bleeding like last time." I looked at him. 

He shook his head. "No, I don't. I can't be high when I go home. I can handle it."

I rolled my eyes. "We'll see... Changkyun, vein, smoke or snort?" He chose to do a line. Taeyong chose a vein but I refused. "Tae, go home... I will not be the one to give you a shot up of heroin." He growled softly.

"I haven't had a fix in three weeks," he whined. "I'm ready to come back, please." He wasn't begging for the job, he was begging for the drugs.

Brian groaned. "Come here," he said. "I'll be the one to do it." He wanted money and didn't know where to draw the line. "You sure you want a vein?" He asked. Taeyong shook his head and started to unbuckle his pants. "Groin?" Taeyong nodded and Brian took care of it. "You can go down to Melrose Avenue amd try to pick up anyone. Bring condoms."

Minhyuk got up and took five condoms, giving one to Taeyong. As they left, Changkyun came up and did his line before leaving. "Why'd you give Taeyong a shot? He's a fucking addict, get him out of the fucking ring!" I yelled at Brian.

He shrugged, not really caring much. "Jooheon, time to learn. You ready?" Jooheon nodded, following Brian to the room down the hall.

It was going to be a very long night tonight...


	2. | two |

I shouldn't be here. I can't function long enough to even pretend to enjoy my job. My baby was home and sick, she needed me. I couldn't deal with Taeyong too. "Hey, you should take my customer..." He said, leaning on me.

"And why would I do that?" I asked, holding him up.

Taeyong giggled. "I'm high as f-fuck," he said, looking at me. "A-And I will fall asleep... Sleep on him." He was out of it. I sighed, picking him up. I was taking him back to the house. He was in danger out here, especially in Compton. 

As we made our way back to the house, I thought over how long I'd been doing this... It'd been so long. 

I used to have a beautiful wife, even though I was only 24 year old. Neveah Jade Bonner was my high school sweetheart. I met her when I was 14 at Summerville High in Corvallis, Oregon. She was my girlfriend the following summer. We dated all through out high school. Inseparable. In our senior year, we were voted Most Likely to Get Married After High School and The Happiest Couple. Little did they know, they were right. We came to California to go to Cal State together and got married in our second year of college. Neveah was interested in Psychology and I was interested in Music. Her major fit her perfectly. She was always so helpful and listened to everyone. Little did I know that it was a mental disorder that would ruin everything.

"Okay," I sighed, helping Taeyong up to the house and getting into the living room. "Tae, we're here..." I shut the door and Kihyun got up, coming to help me.

Kihyun snapped at me, "What the fuck happened?" He asked.

I scoffed. "Nothing," I said, laying Tae on the couch. "He's just fucking high. He told me to take his customer, because he was going to fall asleep on him."

Kihyun furrowed his eyebrows, "What's wrong with that?" He asked.

I glared at him. "Considering these people are paying for sex, what makes you think they'll let up just because their Pay Per Fuck fell asleep in the middle of sex?" I braced myself for what was coming next.

"Who the hell are you talking to like that?" Kihyun got in my face. "Go do your fucking job," he said.

I shrugged. "Bet. Give me my phone." I held my hand out for it.

The confusion on his face was hilarious. "What for? You have your Tracfone."

I shook my head. "This isn't my job," I said. "My job is being a fucking father. My daughter comes before this shit." I said.

Kihyun just laughed. "Isn't she the reason you're doing this? Or... Oh no," he said. "No, the reason is for your dead wife's medical and funeral bills." My jaw clenched. That wasn't a thing to use against me and he knew it.

I refrained from hitting him. This was a dangerous game I've been playing. "Give me my fucking phone so I can go." I glanced over at Taeyong. "Or do I need to be a fucking druggie to get out? I'll do a shot of heroin right now. Let me go take care of my daughter."

Kihyun slammed me against the wall, hitting my back hard. "Don't fucking joke about that." He said.

I laughed a bit, "So you can bring up Neveah and mock me for doing this to pay for everything, but the moment I trash talk another one of your whores, it's nothing to laugh at?" That earned a slap in my face. "Don't leave any fucking bruises!" I yelled.

"Really? No bruises?" Kihyun's hand rose to my neck, choking me for a bit, before releasing. "Make up for the shit you've been causing for me lately and then you can go." Kihyun chuckled, placing kisses on my neck.

I heard my phone ring from his pocket. I moaned softly, grabbing Kihyun by the waist. While he was distracted, I pushed him down onto the other couch and pinned him down long enough to get my phone. Jae had a special ringtone and I knew it had to do with Sariyah. "Jae, what's wrong?" I asked.

"Fever of 103," he said. "I'm about to take her to the emergency room." 

I sighed, rubbing my face. "Bring her mint green stuffed bear," I said. "She'll get along easier with the doctors if she has a distraction. I'll be there soon." With that I hung up and got off of Kihyun.

His asshole pimp demeanor seemed to fade away. "What's going on? I heard emergency room." He said.

I shook my head. "Not telling you shit," I said, heading out. "You'll fucking hold shit against me." I got in the car and rushed to the hospital.

As I got into the emergency room, I was slightly panicked. "Hi, uhm, I am looking for Sariyah Lee? She came in here with her uncle, I'm her father." The receptionist gave me a wristband with my destination. She was under quarantine. "Th-thank you..." I mumbled, heading toward her room.

I tried to calm myself down before getting to Sariyah. She was probably already freaked out about being in quarantine, she didn't need to see me get freaked out about her being in quarantine. "Hey, oh my God, you're here..." Jae said, taking a deep breath. "I was worried something happened to you."

I shook my head. "I'm fine, I'm always fine." Sariyah was sleeping peacefully, holding onto her bear tightly. "What happened?" I asked.

Jae sighed. "Because of her weak immune system, she first got the flu, then it turned into pneumonia," he said. "They put her in quarantine to keep her from getting any sicker... You can go in but you have to be pretty much dressed in hazmat." I shook my head.

"No," I said. "I'm not going to go in there and scare her even more... What if I just tested for sicknesses and washed up well?"

Jae shrugged, "That's probably not how it works but you can try." We sat in silence for a bit, waiting for her to wake up. I shook my head, walking around to the back of her room. I put on some gloves and a mask at least before walking in.

Sariyah shuffled a bit from the noise of the door opening. "Sariyah?" I sang softly. "It's Daddy," I smiled, trying to hide the anxious sound in my voice. I sat by her bed side. "Riyah?" She slowly began to wake up. "Hi, sweetheart," I smiled.

The smile on her face made it all worth it. "Daddy!" She hugged me around my neck, sitting up to face me.

"Hey," I kissed her forehead. "How do you feel?" I asked.

Sariyah shrugged. "Better now that you're here."

I smiled and ran my fingers through her hair as she slowly fell back asleep. I wanted her to know I was there at least, then go back to sleep. I looked up at the sound of knocking. Jae was standing with a doctor. "Sir, you aren't dressed properly. Come out." I sighed and nodded.

I didn't leave without kissing her forehead again. "Goodnight, Riyah. Daddy loves you and he'll be here, I promise." I came out of her room, prepared for the lecture that'd come from the doctor

"Sariyah's immune system isn't strong enough to fight pneumonia, influenza and anything you could give her." I sighed, folding my arms. I didn't want to make her sick, but she needed me. 

Instead, I just nodded and told her that I understood. "Yes, doctor... I'm sorry." She walked away and I sighed, sitting down next to the room. "I'm a terrible father," I groaned.

Jae sat next to me. "No, you're trying to make ends meet. But let me help you out." I shook my head.

"No," I said. "You help raise her. Don't pay for anything..." He prepared to say something but I cut him off. "Jae, I mean it. No." He nodded, just pulling me into a hug.

I was stressed out. And to make things worse, in the middle of my mental breakdown, Kihyun appeared in front of us. "Minhyuk, let's go talk outside." He said.

"Who are you?" Jae asked. He didn't know much about my job except that it was a night shift and he could guess what that night shift was. Plenty of things he could choose from. I looked up at Kihyun and nodded, patting Jae's hand to let him know not to get so defensive.

I sighed and followed after him. "Why are you here?" I asked.

Kihyun led me outside before getting closer to me. "Pull some bullshit like that on me again and I will eviscerate you," he said. "Do you understand?" I nodded, no emotion showing. "Good... Now how much do you need?" He asked.

I furrowed my eyebrows. "Uhm... Depends on how much her medical bill ends up being..." I was confused. He wasn't going to just give me the money.

"Okay," Kihyun said, walking away. I sighed. I needed to get out. I was over Kihyun's games. I just walked back into the hospital, waiting for Sariyah to wake up again.


	3. 》three《

"I'd love to stay and chat," I smiled, kissing the man, Jake was his name I guess. "But I've gotta get going... It's been fun."

Jake was too high and incoherent to realize I was leaving. That marked my last customer. The guy I was supposed to be with Minhyuk on. I sighed softly, calling Kihyun to come get me. I stayed in the hotel lobby so I wasn't extremely targeted on the street. "I'm almost there. How much did you make?" He asked.

I looked around before mumbling. "Honestly, about $5,000 and I haven't really done anything special."

Kihyun hummed a bit. "Maybe you're just that good." I bit my lip, looking down. "I'm outside." He said as he hung up.

I walked outside and got in his car. It was raining heavily outside. "You can just take me to the house and leave me there..." I said. Kihyun glanced over at me, confused for a bit.

"You're staying at my house tonight," he said. "I'm leaving to spend time with Irene." I nodded, knowing that was exactly what he was going to do. Take me to his place, act like he wanted to leave to be with Irene when really he was fighting his temptation to screw me. It was blaringly obvious every time I spent the night at his house. He's been like this since he hired me. He used to train me and Taeyong. Then he just trained me. When Jooheon came along, he observed Brian training Jooheon. Kihyun was an odd pimp. He had a heart. Brian didn't have a heart or a filter. That's where any abuse came from. 

I snapped out of my thoughts looking up at the house we pulled up at. Kihyun's house. "Are you coming back any time soon?" I asked. Even if I pushed to be alone, I never wanted to be. 

Kihyun got out of the car, me following suit. "I-I don't have to go if you don't want me to." I shook my head. Irene loved him, he needed to go.

"Irene's waiting for you," I said. "You need to go." Kihyun tried to rebut, yet I cut him off. "Go, oh my God. I will be fine."

Kihyun sighed, taking me to the front door. "You do not leave this house, don't answer the door or anything. Even if it's Brian. I'll deal with him if he comes here. Other than that, relax. The guest room is obviously open," he said, opening the door. "Be safe, kid. Get some sleep. Uh, the bathroom is all ready if you want to take a shower. See you later." With that, he left me, locking the door behind him.

I sighed softly. He knew way better than to leave me alone. It'd take him an hour to notice. I waited until I heard his car drive off before running downstairs and heading to his room. The man was a pimp and a druglord, I didn't expect him to have any fucking plushies or some shit. I seem innocent to pretty much everyone in our ring. I'm not. I rummaged through some of his drawers to see what he had. Some powders here and there, some needles I didn't dare touch. I settled on his ever so cleverly hidden blotters, sitting in his desk drawer with their look alike stamps. I just had to wait a few minutes for my feel good trip to start.

I went ahead into the kitchen and decided to eat a little bit of bread and drink some water. I wouldn't be eating for quite a while. As I began to go upstairs about 20 minutes later, something felt off to me. Not the obvious high, something else. I shook it off as I headed upstairs. It was time to take a shower, I decided. As I walked into the bathroom and turned on the water, I stripped quickly and jumped in. The feeling of being watched began to rise. 

The next thing I knew, I was screaming, jumping out of the shower and clawing at my skin. Tears started to pour as I grabbed a towel and ran out of the bathroom. My entire body shook as I pulled out my phone to call Kihyun. "Ki-Kihyun?" I asked, crying softly.

"Yes, this is him?" He said professionally. "What seems to be the problem? You sound upset," he said.

I shook my head, whimpering softly. "C-come h-home. Please. Please, come h-home!" I cried, hanging up. I sat in the corner of the guest room as I cried and waited for Kihyun to get there.

The next thing that haunted me were the deafening screams of people around me. I was suddenly back in an awful place of my past. I wanted out and I couldn't get out quick enough. As the screams got louder and louder, a pair of arms wrapped around me tightly. As I screamed out to match the sounds, another soothing voice came to play. "Hey, hey, hey," Kihyun hushed, running his hands over my arms. "Shh, what's wrong, buddy? Hmm?" His voice vibrated as I shook against him.

I shook my head. "F-First, spiders," I said. "Not water in the shower. And then, Nara and Minsoo started screaming because they were caught with dangerous things. And I-" I felt Kihyun shake me a bit after I stopped speaking. I literally couldn't speak. I turned to look at him, pointing at my throat.

"Oh my fucking God," Kihyun gasped. He let go of me, holding his hands. "You're literally fucking burning hot. What did you get into?" He yelled, panicking. He couldn't do much of anything. If I was dying, legitimately dying, he'd have to let me die. The entirety of both of his businesses would be up in flames as he'd be caught. I felt consciousness slip away from me as I heard Kihyun speaking to someone. "An overdose, get me help now."

I came to in a hospital room. What the fuck did he do that for?


	4. | four |

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Minhyuk lets out all the skeletons in his closet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suicide, flashbacks, mental breakdowns, implied self harm.
> 
> This isn't extremely graphic, but it does speak about what was seen. It's practically a flashback chapter. Be careful and please skip to the bottom of this story for a.summarized version of events if you might be too triggered.

As much as I hated it, I had to leave Sariyah later that morning. The doctors had her handled and Jae was with her. But I had to make sure all the bills were paid, and hopefully get an extension on a couple. 

Sadly, that didn't work out well. "Take your pick, electricity or water and gas. One of them is getting shut down in the next three days if you don't pay, we can't wait much longer for you." I nodded, paying for at least my water and gas first.

I left the utilities district and sighed, pulling out my phone. "Kihyun?" I asked, looking both ways before crossing the street. "What did you have in mind when you asked me how much I needed?"

Kihyun sighed. "Come home with me after the hospital... Changkyun's there right now, so when I leave, I can take you with me." I gasped slightly at the fact that Changkyun was in the hospital. But I left it alone as I got in my car, heading that way.

I walked into the hospital faced with Jae in the lobby. "What's going on?" I asked.

Jae sighed, standing up. "Sariyah has a pneumothorax." I furrowed my eyebrows. He knew better than to use technical terms. I need simple terms to explain what's wrong with her. "A collapsed lung," Jae said.

My eyes widened as I started to walk toward the PICU. Jae stopped me. "No, sh-she's probably very scared and in a lot of pain. I-I need to make sure she's not afraid..." I began panicking myself.

"You can't do that on the verge of a panic attack." I sighed softly, holding my head in my hands. "I got this, Minhyuk. You need to take a break."

I shook my head. "I can't take a break. You don't take a break from being a parent." Jae blocked my way one more time. "Fine, okay... I'll go see my friend while I'm here." I turned the other way and headed to the room Kihyun told me to go to.

"Changkyun, you need to drink the fucking water!" Kihyun yelled, pushing the hospital bed table toward Changkyun. 

Changkyun picked up the cup and sat up as if he was going to drink, but instead he chucked the cup across the room. "Fuck you!" He yelled back, shoving the table away from him.

I looked up at Kihyun. "What's all of this?" I asked.

Kihyun sighed, running his fingers through his hair. "This one decided to find my acid blotters in my room that are literally way too toxic for anyone to consume and had a fucked up trip and a half along with a fucking overdose," he said.

"You can overdose on acid?" I asked. Kihyun nodded a bit.

Changkyun sighed, turning on his side. "I just want to go. My mom's gonna be worried," he said.

Kihyun bit his lip, touching his arm softly. "Buddy, your mom isn't worried, okay? Trust me, she's not."

This brought Changkyun to tears. "Why isn't she?" He asked. 

Shortly after he said that, a doctor came in. "Uhm, he's in a confused state right now, and he's probably really stressed out. So maybe you should go home now... I'll have him call you, okay?" Kihyun nodded, signalling me to come with him.

"Come this way," I said, taking a detour to the PICU. I needed to see my little girl. I took as sigh as I headed toward her quarantined room. "Oh my God," I gasped a bit. Sariyah laid in bed holding her bear, avoiding the chest tube they put in her. 

Kihyun looked shocked as I turned to see if he was still behind me. "Is that your daughter?" He asked.

I nodded, walking up to her door. She was watching one of her favorite shows. I knocked on the door a bit. I caught her attention and smiled softly at her, going over to the intercom. "Hi, baby, how do you feel?" I asked softly.

Sariyah smiled a bit. "Tired. But I'm better now you're here. Where's Jae?" She asked.

Jae cleared his throat as he walked up next to me. "Right here, Riyah," he smiled. "Daddy has to go for now. He'll be back later, okay?"

Sariyah nodded, smiling a bit. "Bye Daddy, I love you!" She waved at me as I waved back. 

I left her sight before rolling my eyes. "What the fuck, Jae? That's my fucking daughter why aren't you going to let me see her?" Kihyun disappeared from behind me and headed to the side.

"You're going to drive yourself crazy, you're going to do some stupid shit and end up not being able to take care of Sariyah." I scowled at him, really confused as to why he thought so. 

I sighed, turning to call Kihyun to leave. I looked up and he was watching Sariyah. "Kihyun!" I yelled. "Let's go." He nodded following me out.

We walked put to his car in silence. When he started up the engine, he spoke up. "Sariyah seems like she goes through a lot," Kihyun said, turning out of the parking lot and heading toward the freeway.

I nodded, looking into my lap. "Yeah," I bit my lip, sighing softly. "She's got a weak immune system. We're frequenters here." I began to draw patterns into my pants. "She was a preemie," I said, looking toward Kihyun.

He nodded, switching lanes. "I know they normally give preemies steroids," he said, glancing over at me. "Did they give her any?"

I didn't know why I was willing to trust him with this information but I was. "Yeah, but her immune system was unaffected by it, still weak. Those only work on maturing the organs." Kihyun headed toward the rich part of town and I became suddenly anxious. He was taking me to his house.

As he pulled into his driveway, Kihyun sighed. "Let's go inside and talk." I nodded, getting out of the car, following Kihyun into his house. It was smaller than I could expect. "So, do you want anything to drink? I have soda, Coke products, water, juice?" He didn't offer alcohol? What the fuck was happening? 

"Uhm," I hummed, sitting in the living room. "I-I'll take a Sprite." I was nauseous. Something didn't seem right about this.

Kihyun came into the living room, handing me an unopened Sprite can. At least it wasn't drugged. "Here you go." He sat down, opening his Coke. "So, tell me more about your family. Your wife." He said.

I didn't know what to really say. "I mean... She's gone and it's really hard to be a 24 year old, widower father who also prostitutes to pay bills," I shrugged. "Like, I don't know what you wanted me to say? My wife's dead, thanks for reminding me."

Kihyun sighed. "Don't be hostile, I was just curious about the situation... I'm sorry to overstep." He sipped on his drink.

I shook my head. "You didn't... I just get really defensive about Neveah. There's so many people who literally shrug at what happened to her..." I bit my lip, thinking over it all.

In our third year of college, we had to put everything on hold. Neveah got pregnant. This is where everything fell apart. Neveah and I were still happy about being parents, we were always happy. Everything was fine, as fine as it could be.

 

On September 2nd, we welcomed our baby girl, Sariyah Brooke Lee. That's where things got even worse. Sariyah was born too early at six months of pregnancy. Babies can survive from that point, but not without struggles in the beginning. We couldn't bring Sariyah home until she was a month and a half old. For Neveah, the fact that Sariyah was born too early was extremely hard for her. She often cried to me about being a failure of a mother. I always told her it wasn't true, Sariyah was born and lived and that's just how it was supposed to be. We couldn't predict her premature birth. Neveah didn't ever let it go. It hurt her.

"Do you mind explaining a bit?" Kihyun asked.

I shrugged. "Neveah was extremely depressed after Sariyah was born. Every time Sariyah wouldn't stop crying, she would begin to cry, thinking she was a bad mother. She dropped out of university, not to take care of Sariyah. We had perfect schedules honestly, I went to class in the early morning and she'd go in the evening. She dropped out because she started performing badly because of the depression. She fought for months. Ultimately, she lost.  One day, while I was at work, she took Sariyah to her aunt's house. I was okay with it, maybe she needed a break since I wasn't there to help out. Fine right? It wasn't fine when I called her repeatedly to ask her a simple question about dinner. She didn't answer and that worried me. Her phone shouldn't be dead, right? I left work early and went home to her first before going to get Sariyah. I walk into our bathroom, she's kneeling over like she's praying while bowing down completely..."

Kihyun panicked a bit as the tears fell. "No no, hey... You don't have to finish." I shook my head, wiping my tears.

"She's... I go to make sure she's okay and I pick her up off the f-floor and, uhm... Her shirt was completely stained with blood, it was like she tie-dyed it red." I spiraled down into my own panicked thoughts.

Suddenly, I was opening the door to my apartment, calling out for Neveah. "Babe, you haven't been answering my calls... Where are you?" Nothing. I went into the kitchen, looking around. I noticed our knife set was out. The knives we never used from our wedding gifts. I didn't think much of it, heading to our balcony to see if she was sitting out there. Again, nothing. I sighed, closing the door. "Neveah, baby? Did you stay at your aunt's?" I headed toward the bedroom. Maybe she was sleeping. Not in there. I was ready to turn around to leave until I noticed the bathroom light on. "Neveah? Honey?" I slowly walked into the bathroom and stared in shock at what was in front of me.

The bath was reddened, the floor splattered with pink water. "Oh my God," I gasped. My breath was taken completely away. I shook my head, walking closer to Neveah balled up on the floor. "Veya," I mumbled. "No, baby, come on..." I kneeled down and picked her up, pulling her into my lap. I looked down and saw her arms. "Oh God," I could've thrown up. I dropped her softly, as if I could do harm to her. "H-Help!" I screamed. I ran out of the apartment, running across the hall. "Open up! Help me, please!" I screamed, banging on the door.  

My neighbor, Johnny, opened the door. "Hey, whoa, buddy calm down." Johnny grabbed onto me, holding me tightly.

"No, stop it!" I yelled. "Something's so wrong. I'm not just having anxiety, I need help in here!" I turned around and tried to go back into my apartment.

Johnny wouldn't let me. "Stop, speak to me. What's wrong?"

I turned back around and the words just fell out of my mouth. "Neveah's dead! She's lying on the bathroom floor, arms slit, blood stained shirt, pale. My wife is fucking dead!" Even saying it, I wanted to believe somewhere deep down in my heart that she had a chance left. 

Johnny's eyes widen, "Holy shit," he'd say, running into my apartment with me. As we came back to the bathroom, I covered my face, tears pouring. "Neveah? Can you hear me?" Johnny asked. He checked her pulse. "It's hanging on by a fucking thread..." Johnny sighed. "I'll go call someone okay? Stay with her." Johnny switched spots with me as he went to call for an ambulance.

I sniffled softly, sitting down next to Neveah. "Baby?" I whispered, caressing her face. I let my other hand lay across her chest. She was trying to breathe still. "I've held your hand through all of these years. Veya, you still have all of me, you can't let go yet, please. Please, God... Please just stay with me. Baby, Sariyah needs us. Please, please, please."

I picked her up, standing up and dancing around softly. Our wedding dance, Thinking Out Loud. Johnny came back and stared at me as he watched me lose all hope. "Minhyuk..." He mumbled.

I looked up at him, tears in my eyes, slowly falling. "If I let go of her, she'll die... Sh-She's trying but if I let go of her, she'll die." Johnny shook his head, walking to me. 

As we stood, the sirens began to come into earsight. "Come on, let's go!" Johnny said, leading me downstairs.

I watched the ambulance rush into the parking lot. "M-My wife... Please help her." I let a paramedic take her and jumped in the back with them, Johnny jumping in too.

The memory faded away from me as I came back to reality. Kihyun was now sitting next to me, hand holding mine. "Minhyuk," Kihyun said. I looked up to see the cold hearted, multi-millionaire pimp was crying too. "You don't have to finish... Okay?" He said.

I started and I couldn't just stop. "As we started moving... Johnny held me in a tight hug, not letting me watch them take care of Neveah at all. When we started moving, I knew something was wrong. They didn't turn on the sirens. And I screamed at the medics, begging them to turn the sirens on. Neveah was serious enough for urgent care..."

Kihyun shook his head, "No, Minhyuk," he said. He reached up to wipe my tears. "She wasn't." I looked at him before breaking down completely.

"I know!" I screamed, crying harder than I had been this entire time. Kihyun pulled me into a hug, holding me tightly as I cried into his shoulder. "I told him she'd die if I let her go... If I could change everything, she would've carried Sariyah to term a-and she wouldn't be so depressed and she would be here. She'd be here with me, raising that litle girl that looks just fucking like her. Sariyah would have a sibling. We'd be in that house with a family." Kihyun ran his hands through my hair.

I sniffled, trying to calm down a bit. "Minhyuk, even if she cared Sariyah for at least two more months..." He stopped, before he stepped over a line. I grabbed his hand, letting him speak. "Neveah... Probably would still end up with postpartum depression," he finished. "How much do you need?" 

I furrowed my eyebrows. "I... What's left of Neveah's funeral and hospital bills is like... Damn near 18,000 fucking dollars." Kihyun nodded a bit.

"What about Sariyah? Her bills?" He asked.

I shrugged, wiping my face and sitting up. "Maybe a little bit less than five grand? I stopped looking at the bills, they only get bigger and bigger."

Kihyun acknowledge me again. "I'll give you the money." I looked up at him as he sighed. "I promise you." I nodded, not knowing what to do. Kihyun ran his hands through his hair. And the next thing I knew, I did the only thing I knew how to do. I leaned up to Kihyun and kissed him, softly shifting my way into his lap. Kihyun stopped me, pushing me back.

"What?" I asked. "You get the deepest darkest secret I have. The thing tearing me apart inside. You offer to fix something for me but I still have to pay. So let me pay." I pulled Kihyun back into a kiss.

He shook his head, pushing me off again. "No," Kihyun said, holding onto me. "You don't need to... I don't want anything from you. No sex, no love, nothing. Just... Let me help you."

I shook my head, standing up. "No. If you help me, Jae has to help me and if Jae has to help me, Johnny has to help me. And I can't be helped." I ran my hands through my hair, trying to avoid crying again. "I am a widowed father raising a little girl that gets sick often. I have to give my body up to make ends meet because I can't go to a day job because I remember her. At least I can numb myself. But I cannot be fucking helped..." Kihyun nodded, standing up.

"Get in the car." Kihyun walked off, grabbing his keys. I followed him out and sighed softly. It was a silent ride back to my house. When Kihyun stopped the car, I started to get out but he grabbed my arm. "I don't want to hear a damn complaint about coming in tomorrow night. Unless Sariyah is coding on a goddamn operating table, you're selling." I expected just as much. But I was the one who woke that beast up.

I nodded, "Yes sir." I got out of the car, going inside. As soon as I closed the door, I slid down the front door and bawled my eyes out. I pulled out my phone and called Jae. "Is she asleep?" I asked.

"Yes," Jae sighed. "Why, what's up?"

I sniffled. "Please come home," I cried out. "I don't wanna be alone. I'm scared." I wiped my tears for the thousandth time.

Jae instantly got defensive. "What the fuck did that Kihyun do to you?" He asked.

"I'm scared of me..." I hung up, throwing my phone across the room. I sat in front of the door, crying until I couldn't cry anymore. I always fuck up somehow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After Changkyun's overdose, Minhyuk and Kihyun meet up to discuss a bit about Minhyuk's past and how he became a widower.
> 
> Minhyuk explains to Kihyun that Sariyah was born premature and it sparked a harsh post partum depression within his wife, Neveah. The depression took over Neveah and she dropped out of school. On the day she chose to end it all, she gave Sariyah to her aunt before going home. Minhyuk came home and found her unconscious. He ran across the hall to get his neighbor Johnny who then called for an ambulance. As they took the ambulance ride to the hospital, the sirens weren't being sounded on the way there, telling Minhyuk that Neveah was dead en route.
> 
> After hearing this, Kihyun offers to pay for all the outstanding bills Minhyuk needed to pay but he refused his help. Kihyun then told him to make sure he showed up to work the next day as he dropped him off at his house. 
> 
> Minhyuk is left as a high risk as he waits for Jae to come home.


	5. × five ×

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kihyun has an epiphany of sorts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Self harm, sexual abuse mention, gun violence (if you squint)

I sighed staying in Minhyuk's driveway for a bit. He confided a lot in me tonight and I just snapped at him for declining my help? I made such an empty threat and held the health of his fucking daughter above his head, honestly who the fuck was I? I decided to go talk to him for a little bit. Just until his friend, brother, in-law, whoever Jae was to him got there. I knocked on the door, but Minhyuk didn't answer. He either went to sleep, knew I wasn't Jae or wasn't safe. I knocked again before trying to see if he left the door unlocked. Surprisingly, he did.

"Jae," he called out. He was crying so hard. "Jae, I'm scared." I shook my head, walking toward where his kitchen was. He was crying as he leaned over his counter. 

I daringly spoke up. "What's going on?" I asked. He whipped his head around so quick, hiding his arms behind him.

Minhyuk gasped and turned around. "Go home, Jae knows what to do."

I shrugged. "He's not here, is he?" I asked.

He sighed, "I definitely don't have time to teach you. What are you even doing here?" I didn't answer immediately. "Just go away, this is normal for me when Sariyah's in the hospital."

I bit my lip. "What, you begin to feel like a failure of a parent or failure of a husband?" It probably came out harsh. "Minhyuk, give me your arms before I come over there and make you." He shook his head, turning his back to me again. I swiftly walked over to him and stood behind him, grabbing his arms on top.

"Let go of me!" He screamed, trying to bend over to flip me off of him. He did lift me up off the floor a bit. "Kihyun, I'll scream until Jae comes home. I'll call him and scream. Fucking let me go. I swear to God I will." He said, trying to drop himself in a way that wouldn't hurt him more.

I groaned, pulling his arms up so he'd drop me back to the ground. I turned around a bit and saw the knife on the counter. He pulled his arms back in and bit me. "Minhyuk!" I screamed, letting go of him. "Fuck!" I rubbed my arm before picking up the knife on the counter. "Why?" I asked.

Minhyuk shrugged, calming down a bit. "I get this way sometimes. But I can still think... I've never tried to kill myself with it yet." He said. I walked up to him and tilted his chin up slightly.

"The scar on your neck says differently," I said.

He shook his head. "That knife play customer." 

I furrowed my eyebrows. "You mean the one that killed a prostitute not related to us at all?" I caught that lie.

Minhyuk sighed and the front door opened. "Minhyuk?" Jae called out. I didn't budge. I knew exactly what Jae was about to see. At least what he thought he'd see. "Why the hell are you here?" Jae asked, pulling a gun out on me. Fair play, considering I was holding a knife.

"Fuck, Jae!" Minhyuk yelled. "Put that shit away."

Jae scoffed. "He's holding a knife to you. No fucking chance." He said.

I didn't say anything. I'd take whatever, it was fine. "It's Neveah's knife," Minhyuk said, voice cracking. My expression softened a bit. "I couldn't hold on..."

I looked at Jae. "You didn't hide it away from him?" I asked.

Jae glared at me. "I always find it, there's no point. He always chooses to hide it where Sariyah can't find it and considering I'm her father, I know everywhere that is." Minhyuk took the knife from me, going to the sink to wash it. After he was done, he threw it on the counter in front of Jae. "He dropped me off and apparently never left. So put the goddamn gun down. And don't hide it in my fucking glove box this time. I doubt anyone wants to have a five hour stand off with me in a park." He said, turning Jae away to go put it up.

I furrowed my eyebrows at him. "What did that mean?" I asked.

"It means, we share the car and he thought he cleverly hid it in 'his car' but uhm... He didn't and he sat outside my car along with his girlfriend for five hours while I locked myself in tne car and swore I'd pull the trigger." My jaw dropped slightly.

I felt worse and worse for him. "When was this?" I asked.

Minhyuk chuckled. "After that one night when a customer stayed in the house while you and Brian were making a run and I refused to continue on. He wanted a threesome and I took over once Taeyong got too high. It was me and Changkyun, but he wanted to continue on too many rounds. And he eventually just did whatever."

Minhyuk kept so many secrets. "He ra-" Minhyuk looked away from me, telling me that was true. "God, why didn't you tell me? I still have to protect you guys." That sparked a chuckle from him.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" He asked before getting in my face so he could whisper. "Pimps don't give two shits about their whores. We told Brian. He swore he'd tell you. So imagine our surprise when Taeyong had to meet up with him again." I was growing tired of all of this bullshit.

I shook my head. "I'll talk to him. I didn't know. Uhm... I'll go now, Minhyuk." 

Minhyuk nodded as Jae came downstairs. "Yeah, that'd be wise," Minhyuk said as I made my way to the front door. 

When I got into my car, my phone rang almost instantaneously. "Hello?" I answered.

"They're discharging me," Changkyun said. "You're my contact."

I buckled up. "Be there soon," I said, pulling out of the driveway. Within a half an hour, Changkyun was sleeping on my backseat, and I was headed to my house.

I sighed softly, stressed out with so much. Then, my car spoke up. "New Message from Irene."

I groaned. "Fuck me... Read Message." I said, turning toward my neighborhood.

"The proposal fell through, they won't be signing with the company. That's not the only thing about to fall through, Yoo Kihyun." Great. A breakup threat.

I bit my lip as I approached the gate. I entered my password and headed in. "Send Message to Irene. Let it fall through then. This was probably gonna happen eventually. But you need to call me or come over. I'll let you in but I fucking refuse to do this through text, baby girl." I didn't care. I had a mess to fix, a father to pay, a druggie to get clean, a newbie and a kid to save and a fucking dickhead to get rid of.


	6. × six ×

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kihyun deals with his relationship with Irene.

Irene told me that she'd be over in an hour or so. That gave me just enough time to help Changkyun get settled upstairs. I didn't want to wake him, so I picked him up out of the backseat and carried him inside. He stirred softly. "Where are we?" Changkyun mumbled.

I kicked the front door closed. "My house..." I said. Changkyun's arms wrapped around my neck.

"I want my mom," he said. "I feel like shit and she knows how to make it better." I bit my lip, walking upstairs. 

He was so out of it. "C'mon, let's get you in the bath, yeah?" He smelled strongly of a hospital. 

Changkyun whined. "I want my mom, where is she?" I carried him to the bedroom first.

"Here, stay here, okay? I'll go run you a bath." Changkyun didn't say anything as I left.

I sighed as I bent down to start the water, pouring some lavender bath soap in so he'd relax and go back to sleep later. "Where the fuck is my mom?" Changkyun asked from behind me, effectively scaring the fuck out of me.

I grabbed onto the faucet so I didn't smack my head against it as I whipped around. "Jesus, kid," I sighed. "You scared me."

Changkyun wasn't amused. "Where is she?" He asked again.

I didn't want to be the one to remind him, but he did tell me this. And no one else was gonna remember for him. "She chose drugs, which is why you normally don't do anything harder than what you take before taking johns." The look on his face broke my fucking heart.

"She loves me," he said. "She loves me, I'm her son." Changkyun began crying again and I didn't know how to help him. "You're lying to me, Kihyun. My mother would take me over drugs any fucking day." I shook my head. She didn't. That's one reason why he ended up out here.

I stood up, watching the bath water. I couldn't cry in front of him. He was currently a sensitive child. I had to be a strong person for him. The broken chunks of my heart completely shattered as he butt his head into my shoulder, wanting me to hug him. I pulled him into a tight hug as his hands rested on my waist lazily. "I'm so sorry," I bit my lip. "You're gonna be okay. You don't need her... You needed her for years but you don't now."

Changkyun nodded, sniffling. I still hadn't told him everything he doesn't remember. After this, I'm not sure I want to. "The water's done," he mumbled, wiping his tears. 

I turned off the water and let go of him. "You go ahead and get in, I'll grab you a towel, set out some clothes for you... You look like you might be hungry. I'll leave a snack in the guest room for you." Considering Irene was coming over, I put everything he needed in the bathroom with him so in case he finished while she was here, he'd at least be clothed.

After Changkyun was settled, I set the coffee table a bit just so Irene and I could sit and have a mature conversation. I wasn't going to be the hostile one. As soon as I finished, Irene texted me asking about my password. I told Siri to remind me to change it afterward. Eventually, Irene was knocking on my door. "Wow, scared someone's gonna serve you court papers straight to your door?" She quipped, walking in.

"Well, hello to you too, Irene." I closed the door behind her following her to the living room. "I want to be as quick as possible while being as civil as possible," I said. "I don't ask for anything else."

Irene glared at me as she sat down on the couch. "Why can't you be with me?" She asked.

I shrugged, sitting down with her. "I don't know, you tell me. I didn't insinuate a break up. If you want one, I can't force you to stay." I was packed with answers to any of her questions tonight.

"Then fight for me, Kihyun," she said. "Your lover is about to walk out and not turn back. How can you take that so easily? Unless you've been cheating on me."

I sighed. "Now, who would I cheat with?" I asked 

Irene scoffed as she started counting on her fingers. "Lisa, Jane, Nancy, Rosie, Somi, Wendy. Shit, I don't know your sexuality, probably Hoseok, Hyojong, Hyunwoo, Hyung-wow you hire so many guys with H names." Irene sighed, running out of breath. Damn, I knew this girl could talk but not this much.

I sat up. "Look me in the eye, Irene," I said taking her hands. She continued looking straight ahead. "Ah, ah," I said, tilting her head to look at me. "I fucking love you, woman. You're being a little dumb right now, not gonna lie. But I respect you too much to force you to stay with me just because I'm the CEO of a huge business. Unless you want my money, don't stay with me for that reason. I'll gladly let you go if you want to be free. You can be free."

Irene sighed and leaned forward, kissing me softly. "I'm sorry, Kihyun..." She said, biting her lip. The lip bite that drove me crazy.

Just as I leaned into another kiss, Changkyun came out of the guest room upstairs. I didn't realize he was done with the bath even. "Kihyun," he whined.

Irene bit her lip in anger and closed her eyes. "Who the actual fuck is that?" She asked me.

I didn't pay much mind to her. She was going to leave anyway. "Yes, Changkyun?" I asked.

"I feel sick," he said, ignoring Irene's presence.

Suddenly, I felt a slap across my face. "Fucking pig!" She screamed. I groaned in pain as I tried to grab her hand to explain. "No, get the fuck off of me! Don't fucking touch me!" She began crying as she got up. "Stop, Kihyun. Don't say anything to me. You can't fix this. But you'll pay." I ran my fingers through my hair as the front door closed. 

I started heading upstairs, coming to take care of Changkyun. "I-I'm sorry, I didn't know you had company..." I shrugged it off.

"Company's not here anymore," I sipped on my water. "Irrelevant now."

Changkyun began playing with the hem of his shirt. "Yeah but..." He sighed. "I should go... Really, you do a lot for me. You don't have to do much more." He said.

I shook my head. "It's fine. I take a lot from you too..." Changkyun nodded staying silent. "What feels sick, bub?" I asked, taking him back to his room. 

"I don't know..." He whined. "But I'm really fucking scared."

I shushed him as I laid him down in bed. "What's so scary? Tell me." I got into bed on the other side so he could cuddle into me until his anxiety calmed down. There was nothing I could do to stop it except give him a tranquilizer and I didn't want to do that.

Changkyun just broke down into tears, grabbing onto my shirt. "Please, tell me why my mom chose drugs over me." I bit my lip as he cried.

I ran my hand over his hair. "Okay, but you gotta look at me, bud. We gotta look at each other." He nodded, wiping his tears and sitting up, looking at me. "How much do you remember?" I asked.

Changkyun shrugged. "I know my mom was a single teen mother."

I nodded. "You don't know your grandparents. They didn't want anything to do with your mom, right?" He nodded, fiddling with his shirt. "Your mom didn't know much of what else to do. She stayed with friends, but they were awful influences. They did drugs a lot, hard ones. And your mother got addicted. But she didn't have a house and she couldn't live on the streets with you. So she went to the shelter. You've told me she met her dealer as she was looking for a job. She paid for everything the way Minhyuk does. She thinks he loves her. And he hurt you growing up, yeah?" He was slowly remembering, I could tell. He wasn't crying about it. "The moment you began challenging him, she often chose him. You'd be punished, especially after you'd run away. And you made one last ditch effort to get away. You came out." I took his hand to relax him if he became anxious.

Changkyun nodded. "I came out as bi."

I nodded. "And you were kicked out..." I finished. "You okay?" Changkyun shrugged, laying down next to me.

"Thank you." I laid down too and he laid his head on my chest. "Goodnight," he said.

I ran my hand through his hair, mixed with back rubs. "Goodnight, kid." After a few moments, Changkyun was sleeping soundly. I slowly but surely fell asleep myself.


	7. | seven |

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Minhyuk tries to cope in a different way.

"Why the fuck would you pull the gun out, Jae?" I yelled. "You know that shit isn't okay to put around me." I didn't want to die. I was just stressed out with Sariyah being sick. That was why I cut myself. But I also never knew when to stop.

Jae sighed softly. "I was afraid Kihyun was here. I don't know why you protect him but goddamn, he's creepy and I don't trust him."

I scoffed, putting the knife away. I trusted that man with my fucking life. Ironically, he'd probably sell me in a heartbeat. "He was here while you weren't," I sighed softly.

Jae laughed out of irritation. "Yeah, I was watching your fucking child!" He yelled.

I looked up at him, walking to him. "Don't you fucking dare do that shit when you won't let me be there for her!" I pushed a vase on the floor, letting it shatter. "You're right, she is my fucking child, Jae. Sariyah is my fucking daughter, the only thing I have left of my wife, my entire fucking world and I'd sell my soul if it meant she was happy and healthy. I have to pay for my dead wife's bills, I have to pay for Sariyah's bills and I'm out here every fucking night risking everything to make that money and you're really about to shit on my efforts in being her fucking father?" Jae sighed and tried to speak. "No, fuck you, get the fuck out of my house. I know I'm not a perfect father but I am fucking trying. I admit when I need help, but if my help is gonna fucking throw shit in my face, I'd rather be struggling and alone. I refuse to let you make me feel like a worse father than I already feel. Clearly, you don't remember what every single one of these is for!" I pointed at my wrist before directing him to leave. "So get the fuck out, Jae. Go to Hell."

Jae had remorse in his face before he left. I locked the front door and sighed. I felt like a fucking failure enough as it was. I didn't want to be alone but I didn't want to be in Jae's company. So I called a friend. "You haven't called me in a month," Wonho said. "What's the deal?" He asked.

"Shut up and come over," I sighed. "Bring some booze." As I hung up, I just had the worst ideas running through my head. The fact that I was about to have my ex here instead of being at the hospital? I decided to text Jae and tell him to go back to the hospital. I wasn't gonna make it back there tonight.

About thirty minutes later, Wonho was knocking on my door. The moment I opened the door and Wonho stepped in, I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him into a kiss. "Oh?" Wonho chuckled, pushing the door shut behind him with his foot. "It's that kind of night?"

I nodded, pushing his jacket off of him, kissing deeper. "I just need something..." I whimpered. Wonho pulled me closer to him, his tell tale sign of telling me to jump.

As I did, his arms wrapped around my waist and I felt safe. I felt happiness spread warmly through my body. Wonho pulled away to breathe for a second. "Damn," he chuckled. "Let's drink a bit first okay?" I nodded, understanding why he suggested that. Our break up was rough. Every hook up afterwards started with a few drinks. Wonho didn't let go of me, carrying me and his bag to my bedroom. As he sat on my bed, I moved to straddle him and giggled lightly. Wonho opened his bag to hand me a bottle of vodka.

"Thank you," I smiled, cracking the seal. The sting of the vodka surged through my body quickly.

Wonho chuckled, drinking some after me. "Okay, now where were we?" He asked, kissing my neck in all the right spots.

I couldn't help but let a moan escape, fingernails digging into Wonho's back, earning a groan from him. Soon enough our bodies were rocking together, trying to get off as much as we could without actual sex. "Fuck," Wonho whimpered uncomfortably. "Stop, Minhyuk." His tone worried me. "Do you have any condoms?" I shook my head. I hadn't personally bought any for myself since we broke up. "I didn't bring one. Let's stop while we're ahead, okay?" I was confused, but I respectfully got off of him. "I'll stay with you. I assume Sariyah's sick?" 

I nodded. "Yeah," I mumbled. "And I just had a fight with Jae." I didn't know why he suddenly refused sex, but he did.

"If you wanna try again tomorrow night, I'll make sure to bring condoms." I nodded, laying down as Wonho laid with me. I still loved him somewhere in there.

I shrugged slightly. "I kinda had a breakdown. Told my boss everything about Neveah..." Tears started to fall again. "And he dropped me off here, and then I called Jae to come home. I didn't trust myself alone. But, turns out that my boss was still outside. He came in about ten minutes before Jae got here. He saw my cuts, these new ones here. Jae came in with the gun and there was a huge fight after my boss left. An-" I groaned out loud.

Wonho pulled me closer to him by my waist. "What's up?" He asked. I was frustrated, sad... So many things.

"Well," I started. "He thought my boss was harming me and I told him he was there when he wasn't. Then he threw the fact that he was with Sariyah. And I wasn't. Then I told him to leave and we share the car. He fucking took it and now I don't have a fucking car."

Wonho leaned in and gave me a soft kiss. "Stop worrying. Let's spend the night at my house, get you away from here, away from your weapons. And you can take either the Liberty or the Traverse. And I still have a booster seat. If it's not the right one, I will go buy a new one." Wonho pulled me even closer to him as I nodded, tears pouring.

"I don't know what to do," I bawled. "I'm trying. I really am." Wonho shushed me, petting my hair.

My arms wrapped around his neck. "I know you are. I know, baby." God, he hasn't called me that in so long. "Come on, go get your phone, keys, jacket. We can go." I nodded, letting go of him, sitting up.

We left about five minutes later and I got a call. "Help us," the voice said. "Please. N-No one else is answering!" I furrowed my eyebrows trying to figure it out. Then he whined.

"Fuck," I mumbled, turning to Wonho. "Don't go home yet. Taeyong, where are you?" 

Taeyong's whimpering began to get erratic. "Help me!" He screamed, tears prominent in his voice.

I sighed softly. "I'm trying, you gotta help me bud," I said. "Where are you?" I bit my lip, nervousness shaking me.

"I-I'm at th-the h-house," Taeyong stuttered through. "Please... Help us. Brian's angry." Fuck. He was with Brian.

I entered in the address to Wonho's GPS. "Okay, okay, breathe slowly. I'll call Kihyun and we'll come get you okay?"

Taeyong cried out. "I don't wanna die, Minhyuk, please help me." His fear broke me apart.

"You won't, I'm on the way. I gotta hang up, bud. Okay?" Taeyong agreed and hung up. "Fuck, fuck, fuck..." I was so scared for him.

Wonho looked at me. "What was all of that about?" He asked.

I shook my head. "You don't wanna know." I held my phone back up to my ear.

"Hello?" Kihyun asked in a sleepy tone.

I sighed softly, relieved he picked up. "You need to get up and get to the house, now." I said.

Kihyun perked up. "I can't leave Changkyun here alone, what's wrong?" He asked.

"Taeyong called me, said he needed help, him and someone else, said Brian's angry."

Wonho turned down the street of the house. "Fuck, I'm on my way." Kihyun hung up.

As Wonho pulled over, I jumped out of the car. "Stay out here, don't come in." Wonho nodded, parking. I ran inside the house. "Taeyong?" I called, yelling out for him. I ran to one of the bedrooms and saw Brian standing in front of Taeyong and Jooheon. They were practically naked. "Brian, what the fuck dude?" I asked.

Brian chuckled a bit. "Shut the fuck up. These two need to learn some shit."

I furrowed my eyebrows at him. "Learn what?" I asked.

"They don't know how the business works. They need to learn." He said.

Kihyun came in a few moments after. How the fuck did he get here so fast? "Send them fucking home, Brian." Kihyun walked up and grabbed Taeyong who clung to him, crying extremely hard. "Oh my fucking God, Brian, look at this!" Taeyong was covered with bruises. I walked to Jooheon and grabbed him. He didn't speak much, he just limped toward the door.

Taeyong's unconsolable tears hurt so much. "Kihyun," he cried. "I want out. Please. Please, I want out."

Kihyun shushed him. "Okay, Tae, I'll get you out." He hugged him tightly. "Brian, you and me will talk later, God..." He sighed, walking out with Taeyong. I grabbed their clothes and headed out after them. 

"What happened?" I asked them as we all left the house. 

Taeyong couldn't speak and Jooheon just didn't speak. "Do you think you could take Jooheon with you? Taeyong needs extra help." Kihyun sighed.

I looked at Wonho, telling him to roll the window down. "Is it possible to take him with us?" I asked. He nodded. "Okay, come on Jooheon, you can come with me." I smiled at him taking his hand.

Wonho started to drive off after we got in. "You gotta tell me what the hell all of that was, though," he said. 

I sighed. "Okay... Later though." It was silent the entire ride to his house. I just wanted this shit to stop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I have a little game for you guys.
> 
> Wonho seems a little weird, suddenly rejecting Minhyuk like that. They trust each other a lot, so they probably don't normally use condoms. But suddenly, he's not going to without one? What could that be? And he doesn't know Minhyuk's a prostitute. What do you guys think?


	8. 》eight《

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw: suicide attempt

I woke up alone, a nightmare waking me up. I was sweating so much. "Kihyun," I whined. He wasn't lying next to me. "Kihyun?" I got up to look for him. He was nowhere to be found. Didn't he know better than to leave me alone by now? I sighed, heading downstairs to Kihyun's room. I honestly couldn't care anymore. I couldn't. I got myself into a shittier life. If I could've just stayed in a kid's place and let my mom deal with her shit herself, maybe I'd be okay. I vaguely remember a foster home. Maybe if I kept my mouth shut, I'd still be with her. 

I sighed, looking through Kihyun's stash again. The LSD was to forget. Whatever was next was to move on. Forever. Sleeping pills, such a simple choice. I made sure Kihyun wasn't around before taking a bottle. In Kihyun's mini fridge, I found a small bit of vodka left, so I chased it down with that. I never realized I was suicidal until I overdosed on acid. Part of me wished that Kihyun never reminded me of my mom.

That three letter word... Mom. Who even was she to me? I grabbed my phone, scrolling through my contacts. She wasn't in them. So I tried my very old Facebook. Surprisingly, she was still very active on Facebook. She'd been messaging me for a year it seemed like. Begging me to come home. I decided to message her. I typed out an extremely long paragraph to her.

Then the door opened. "Changkyun, what the fuck?" Kihyun yelled. 

"Please don't yell," Taeyong whined. "It hurts."

Kihyun covered his ears a bit. "What the hell are you doing in here? What did you take?" He led Taeyong to his attached master bathroom, turning on the bath. "You sit here and wait, okay?" When Kihyun came back, I tried to finish typing my paragraph to my mother. Everything was becoming blurry. "Changkyun, answer me, what did you fucking ta-" I locked eyes with him. "Changkyun?" I shook my head. He walked up to me. "Damn, your pupils are blown... Lay down." I stepped forward to walk with him and fell into his arms. "Goddamn it!" He yelled. "I cannot keep fucking saving you goddamn motherfucking druggies!" That was the last thing I heard before I felt my sight flicker.

"Changkyun?" Kihyun asked in a low voice. "Hey, buddy..." I was so confused, out of it. All I knew was I wasn't dead. I tried to get up but Kihyun gently held me down. "No, no, don't get up. Okay? The ambulance is on the way." I could only moan in confusion. "You had a seizure okay? You can't move." I glanced between his hand, which was covered with my spit and his face. I couldn't process it at all. The rapid glancing back and forth sent me back to being unconscious.

When I came back again, I was in a hospital room. "Yeah... Yeah he's gonna need to stay here or go to rehab. He is a troubled child, almost 18. He's like two weeks away from his 18th birthday. If he'll live to see it." It was Kihyun. But another voice came out.

"I-I didn't know where he was. Thank you so much!" My eyes slowly opened and glanced around the ceiling. I hated that voice. I groaned, feeling the severe headache that pressed in my head. "Oh my God, Changkyun?" I felt my hand get touched and I saw her face appear out of my peripheral.

I took a few deep breaths, tightening my hand into a fist. "Get her out of here," I said. 

Kihyun furrowed his eyebrows. "I-It's... She's your mom," he said. "I was able to get her."

I nodded. "Yeah. Congratulations, you got the woman who gave birth to me. You got my egg donor. Wanna find my sperm donor too? Get her out of here!" I yelled. I didn't want to see her. I just wanted my answers.

"Changkyun, please..." She pleaded.

I shook my head. "I will press the goddamn emergency help button. Get her the fuck out of here. She has some fucking balls to come see me after she let me get hurt so many times by her fucking crackhead boyfriend. She didn't do a damn thing then, why do something when I try to hurt myself?"

My mom spoke up again. "I would've gotten killed if I did anything, you know that!" She yelled.

I threw myself straight up, getting face to face with her. "So watching your kid die inside is better? It's not like you were taking care of me anyway. Some parents die for their kids, woman. I think I would love you more and have more of an appreciation for you if you did fucking die for me. Because at least you died trying to protect me. But you didn't, you didn't try. So get the fuck out!" Kihyun grabbed my hand before I pressed the emergency button. He held onto me as he told my mom to leave. As she left, I burst into tears, holding onto Kihyun's arm. "Why did you let her come back? Why did you let her?" Kihyun hushed me.

"I-I thought you wanted her," he whispered. "Shh, I'm sorry buddy..." Kihyun had so much regret in his voice.

I let out such a painful cry, it almost broke pieces of my shattered heart. "Please, Kihyun... I don't want to do any of this anymore. I want out of the ring, I want out of the pain. I want out of life!"

Kihyun hushed me again. "You're okay... I'm gonna get you out. I have a question for you, though." I looked up at him. "There was a customer you guys took. He wouldn't let you guys stop... What was his name?" He asked.

My eyes widened. "Who told you?" I asked. I started to panic just thinking about him. We swore that to secrecy. We were taking that to the grave, Minhyuk, Taeyong, and I. When Taeyong had to go with him at least. "No, no, we don't talk about him." I began breathing heavily.

Kihyun ran his hand through my hair. "No, no, no, shh. Hey..." He tilted my face up to see him. "I need to keep you guys safe. And I failed, I admit that. But I need to keep him away from you guys. Brian never told me anything. You can tell me."

I clenched my teeth together, anger, anguish and anxiety ravaging my body. "I said, we don't fucking talk about it." With that, I shoved Kihyun away from me and laid down.

"You have three choices, Changkyun," Kihyun said as he began to leave. "You go to rehab, paid for by me. You go back with your mom or you come live with me while you attempt to get your GED and perhaps start a college course, paid by me." The door opened as I took a deep breath. "I have to go take care of a few other things. Don't make the doctors call me and tell me you refuse to eat, take medications or refuse to cooperate at all. I will have you stuck with a feeding tube, committed to psych, on lockdown for 72 hours with a thorazine drip and you'll no longer have choices. Please make it easy, kid." The door shut and I let my tears flow again. I hated everything. And now that Kihyun knows about Mr. Oh, who fucking knows will happen? Brian probably hid it from him for a reason. A reason none of us wanted to find out.


	9. × nine ×

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kihyun juggles dealing with Changkyun, Taeyong and a possible lawsuit, all the while trying to figure out how to help the boys get out.

Taeyong's crying was the most heartbreaking thing I'd ever heard in my life. He was honestly such a sensitive person, I don't know how he ever ended up here. A hurt puppy, if you will. "Kihyun... I'm gonna pu-" Taeyong started gagging. He'd cried himself out to the point of vomiting.

"Come here," I cooed softly, pulling him into my bathroom. He didn't make it to the toilet. "Ah..." I held Taeyong so he didn't fall down into his own mess.

His tears didn't stop. "I-I'm sorry," he cried. "Don't hurt me. I'm sorry Kihyun." I tried to leave him where he was but he was so dizzy, lightheaded and dehydrated that he started to fall.

I grabbed onto him tightly. "Shh it's okay, come with me." We walked away from his mess and got to the bath. "Here, get undressed and let me start a bath for you." I sat on the edge of the tub, helping him undress. As I helped him get into the tub, I began to run the water for him. "Are you allergic to lavender?" He shook his head, exhausted and done for the day. "Okay, good." I grabbed a lavender bath soap and drizzled it under the running faucet. His scent triggered my own gag reflex. He smelled strongly of piss. "What did he do to you?" I asked. 

I didn't want Taeyong to share if it was gonna hurt him, but he seemed okay to speak. Until he started speaking. "What didn't he do is the real question. At least he didn't expose us to actual shit." I excused myself for a moment to put on some shorts.

"Sit up, Tae," I said, sitting on the edge of the tub behind him. He rested his back against my legs, laying back onto my knees as I cleaned him up. Bruises painted a painful picture all over his skin. 

Taeyong hiccupped out a sob. "Get me out, Kihyun," he whimpered. "Let me out, I want to get out. I don't want the drugs anymore, I don't want the sex, I don't want the money, please... Get me out." He was in hysterics at this point.

I shushed him, pouring some shampoo into his hair. "It's okay, I got you." I began to lather up the shampoo in his hair. He leaned into the massage I was giving his scalp, slowly calming down and falling asleep.

I finished giving Taeyong a bath and took him to my room. I found some boxers for him and slipped them on him and then found a large oversized shirt for him. I tucked him into bed and left him to sleep.

I went to my office and began doing some searching. Changkyun was suffering and I felt like it was partially due to not having his mother around. He needed a parent. I wasn't his parent. I could try to guide him anyway I could, but only a parent could give him the best. Fortunately there were very few Ims on Facebook.

Later on in the morning, Taeyong and I headed to the hospital. I had to give him a sedative to even help him calm down. I met with Changkyun's mother. She seemed like a put together, respectable woman. She seemed like she'd gotten her life together. 

"Yeah... Yeah he's gonna need to stay here or go to rehab. He is a troubled child, almost 18. He's like two weeks away from his 18th birthday. If he'll live to see it." The concern on his mother's face seemed genuine.

"I-I didn't know where he was. Thank you so much!" I smiled at her as I heard a groan. "Oh my God, Changkyun?" His mother ran toward his side.

Changkyun took a few deep breaths, tightening his hand into a fist. "Get her out of here," he said. 

I furrowed my eyebrows. "I-It's... She's your mom," I said. "I was able to get her." I was confused, I thought he wanted her. He messaged her.

Changkyun nodded. "Yeah. Congratulations, you got the woman who gave birth to me. You got my egg donor. Wanna find my sperm donor too? Get her out of here!" He yelled. I began to shush him so no one came in here.

"Changkyun, please..." She pleaded. She really wanted to be in his life.

Changkyun shook his head. "I will press the goddamn emergency help button. Get her the fuck out of here. She has some fucking balls to come see me after she let me get hurt so many times by her fucking crackhead boyfriend. She didn't do a damn thing then, why do something when I try to hurt myself?"

His mom spoke up again. "I would've gotten killed if I did anything, you know that!" She yelled.

He threw himself straight up, getting face to face with her. "So watching your kid die inside is better? It's not like you were taking care of me anyway. Some parents die for their kids, woman. I think I would love you more and have more of an appreciation for you if you did fucking die for me. Because at least you died trying to protect me. But you didn't, you didn't try. So get the fuck out!" I grabbed Changkyun's hand before he pressed the emergency button. I held onto hin tightly.

"Okay, I think you should probably go now, ma'am..." I said kindly. Changkyun's mom nodded, heading out of the door.

As she left, he burst into tears, holding onto my arm. "Why did you let her come back? Why did you let her?" I shushed him softly.

"I-I thought you wanted her," I whispered. "Shh, I'm sorry buddy..." I felt awful. I just wanted to help him.

Changkyun let out such a painful cry, it was almost haunting. "Please, Kihyun... I don't want to do any of this anymore. I want out of the ring, I want out of the pain. I want out of life!"

I held Changkyun tighter, hushing him again. "You're okay... I'm gonna get you out. I have a question for you, though." His teary eyes met mine. I was scared to ask him. Only because I was scared to hear the answer. "There was a customer you guys took. He wouldn't let you guys stop... What was his name?" I asked.

Changkyun's eyes widened so much, it looked like his pupils blew again... "Who told you?" He asked. He started to panic, shaking in my arms. "No, no, we don't talk about him." He began breathing heavily.

I ran his hand through his hair. "No, no, no, shh. Hey..." I tilted his face up to look at me. "I need to keep you guys safe. And I failed, I admit that. But I need to keep him away from you guys. Brian never told me anything. You can tell me."

Changkyun gritted his teeth and growled at me. "I said, we don't fucking talk about it." With that, he shoved me away and laid down.

"You have three choices, Changkyun," I said as I began to leave. "You go to rehab, paid for by me. You go back with your mom or you come live with me while you attempt to get your GED and perhaps start a college course, paid by me." I opened the door to see Taeyong on the floor by the door. "I have to go take care of a few other things. Don't make the doctors call me and tell me you refuse to eat, take medications or refuse to cooperate at all. I will have you stuck with a feeding tube, committed to psych, on lockdown for 72 hours with a thorazine drip and you'll no longer have choices. Please make it easy, kid." I shut the door, picking Taeyong up. "Come on, let's go..." Tae latched onto me, whining softly.

I sighed, getting him into the car. Once I sat down behind the wheel, all hell broke loose within me. I immediately began hyperventilating, crying my eyes out. "Fuck... Fuck!" I ruined everything in everyone's life. 

In the middle of my breakdown, I got a text from one of my employees, Hyungwon. Followed by a call from him. "I just went to your mailbox... I happened to see what looked like court papers, Mr. Yoo. What trouble could you have gotten into?"

I hung up the phone. Irene really went through with her threat. I took a deep breath. I'm fucked.


	10. | ten |

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Minhyuk opens up to Wonho about what he does and Wonho's secret is revealed.

We pulled into Wonho's driveway and I sighed, looking in the backseat. Jooheon was knocked out, curled up. I got out of the car, opening the back door. "Jooheon?" I asked. He stirred ever so slightly. "Come on, honey." I helped him out of the car, carrying him to the front door. He weighed literally nothing. Wonho opened his front door and turned off his alarm. "Okay, Jooheon, I'm gonna take you to the bathroom and you're gonna take a bath then go to bed, okay?" Jooheon didn't responde to me.

I nodded, carrying him upstairs. "Remember," Wonho said. "I'm expecting an explanation from you." I bit my lip, continuing on to the bathroom.

"Alright, honey..." I mumbled. "I'm gonna sit you on the counter and then run you a bath, okay?" Jooheon stared blankly at the ground. I started up his bath for him. When I turned around, Jooheon was still clothed. "Hey," I smiled. "Do you mind if I help you?" I asked, pushing his jacket off of him. He didn't protest. I then took off his shoes. Nothing. I gingerly reached for his shirt hem and that's where the trouble came in. Jooheon groaned and pushed me away from him, which threw me into the closet door of the bathroom. I nodded, putting my hands up, throwing in the towel. "Hey, hey, it's okay... I won't undress you. Let me get you clothes and then I'll leave you alone." I went into the guest room, grabbing some of my clothes. "Okay, here you go. Knock on the door seven times when you're done and I'll come take you to bed."

I went downstairs, sitting on Wonho's sofa, next to him. "Ready to tell me what the fuck happened tonight?" He wasn't mad, just very curious.

I nodded, taking his hand in mine. He squeezed softly to assure me that it was okay. I hope he was right. Something told me he wasn't. I stared at our hands and sighed softly. "For years now... Before we had our relationship, right when Neveah's bills came back to bite me in the ass, I found myself in a bad situation. I needed money, Sariyah was starting to get sick... I didn't know what to do." I glanced up at Wonho to see his jaw clench ever so slightly. I couldn't tell if it was a presumptuous anger or concentration. "I-I... Wonho, I-" I started crying. I knew what I was. I never said the word out loud. And it was so hard to say.

"You what?" Wonho asked softly. I looked down again, mumbling the words. "I can't hear you, baby... You what?" Wonho's free hand reached up to caress my face.

I sniffled, locking eyes with him before whispering. "I'm a prostitute..." I let out a sob, crying progressively harder and louder. "I-I'm a prostitute. And he's a prostitute, him upstairs. The other guy that Kihyun took, he's a prostitute. There's another one..."

Wonho cut me off. "Who's Kihyun?" He asked.

"My... Our pimp," I whimpered. "One of them. The other one was inside. A-And the one Kihyun took, he was this one that called me and asked me to help them and I just..." I took a deep breath, trying to calm down. "I'm sorry, Wonho... I really am." I leaned my head down and cried more.

Wonho sighed. "Were you out there whoring around when we were together?" My crying stopped instantaneously. When I was out there on the streets, I wasn't a father and I wasn't a boyfriend. I was whoever's pay per fuck. "Oh my God," Wonho said, letting go of my hand, standing up. "You were letting guys fuck you and came home and laid with me in the same fucking bed the same fucking night?" He chuckled to himself, inhaling deeply. "So that fucking explains it. That explains fucking everything!" I jumped, covering my head as a vase shattered on the opposite wall.

I shook violently as I looked up at Wonho. "Explains what?" I asked.

Wonho shook his head. "It was you! You did this to me!"

I stood up, yelling back at him. "Did what? What did I do?" Wonho almost turned around and pinned me against the wall, but he stopped himself before he did so. He wasn't abusive. He wasn't going to start.

"I have a disease now, Minhyuk." He said, running his hands through his hair, tears starting to fall. "That's why I didn't have sex with you tonight. I don't have any condoms. I'm sitting here with a goddamn motherfucking death sentence... And it seems like you gave it to me. "

I was dumbfounded. I didn't know what exactly to say. "It wasn't me," I mumbled. "I didn't give you anything. I'm clean. I don't know what to tell you about it, but I'm clean, Wonho..." He shook his head. "And you know damn well, damn motherfucking well that you were cheating on me toward the end of our relationship. With someone who didn't have a daughter. Someone who wasn't always on the downlow. Someone better. But how much better could they be to not tell you that they had a fucking STD?" I asked.

Wonho's anger sparked again. "You listen to me and you listen real fucking good, Lee Minhyuk. Don't you ever make Hyungwon out to be the whore you are. You like what you do."

I chuckled. "Oh yeah, that's the fucker's name. Hyungwon. Chae Hyungwon. You know, you ain't gotta be a whore to get a disease." I heard the seven knocks from upstairs. "Just kidding, you wouldn't know that. You're the one who laid down with the dogs and got up with fleas." I ran upstairs, opening the bathroom door. "Hey buddy, we're gonna go now, okay?" Jooheon hummed in confusion. It was progress. The most sound he had ever made.

"He doesn't have to go anywhere," Wonho said. "You do." I chuckled softly, shaking my head. 

I took Jooheon into my arms. "I go where he goes. Fuck you." As we started to leave the bathroom, Wonho grabbed me.

He sighed softly. "I'm sorry. You guys can stay here tonight. Our deal's still on... I've just been angry since I found out and I took it out on you. I'm sorry Minhyuk."

I took Jooheon to the guest room, getting him into bed. As I closed the door, I looked toward Wonho. "Normally, I'd take your apology. But that one hurt. I keep myself clean. I cannot afford to catch a disease and fucking die. Sariyah doesn't need both of her parents dead. I love that little girl with all my heart. I better fucking love her and be willing to do anything for her." I started to tear up and instinctively wiped my eyes. "No, I don't love it. I hate it everyday. I want out. But it's easy money. So it's whatever. Thank you for keeping the deal. But what you said was so over the line... What I said about Hyungwon was also wrong, but honestly. Where else could you have gotten it?" I sighed softly, heading to the second guest room. "Goodnight, Wonho," I mumbled, shutting the door.

I began bawling my eyes out the moment I was secluded. I grabbed my phone, texting Kihyun. I wanted out. He needed to get me out. I had to be a better father.


	11. | eleven |

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Minhyuk begins taking care of everyone except himself.

I woke up to the sound of Jooheon groaning. He was having another night terror. I sighed, getting up off of the floor and climbing into bed behind him, tightening my arms and his arms around him. "Shh, it's okay. He's not here..." I kept him calm enough to drift off to sleep for the third time. I timed myself. The first time he'd woken up, I'd held him for about five minutes. The second time, ten minutes. So I tried 15 minutes this time. The longer I held him, the longer he slept before having another night terror. It shouldn't last much longer. The sun was due to come up in a few hours.

A knock on the door made me tighten my grip on Jooheon so he didn't wake up again. Wonho opened the door slowly. "Can I come in?" He asked.

I nodded, avoiding his eyes. "I just got him back to sleep..." Wonho stood on the other side of the bed. "I only know what to do because of Sariyah... But hers are nowhere near as bad as this. She'll wake up once. He's woken up three times tonight."

Wonho nodded, looking at me. I glanced up to see him, since he hadn't talked. "I can take over," he said. "You need sleep." I scoffed softly.

"I'm not at the hospital," I said. "This is the least I can do." Wonho sighed softly before chuckling.

I glared at him. "Don't even. Don't look at me like that laugh was out of line. I'm giving you a fucking break so that you can go to the hospital." Wonho walked away as he was raising his voice. "The only reason you can't leave Jooheon here with me is because you can't face your brother in law and your daughter knowing you let men fuck you for money. He gets it. Jae won't. But, it's whatever. Stay here and mope about how you aren't there for Sariyah instead of actually being there for her." Wonho left and I scoffed, getting up to follow him.

I ran downstairs, catching up to him. "Don't fucking do that. You know damn well that shit gets me riled up."

Wonho slammed his hand down on his countertop. "Fucking good! I'm glad it does, Minhyuk. Because while you're here taking care of everyone else, your daughter could fucking die in the hospital with only her uncle by her side. Not her rock, not her best friend. Her fucking uncle. The last people she'd see wouldn't include her fucking father." I shook my head, running my hands through my hair. The thought that my baby girl could die began to torture me. "Go to the fucking hospital and stay with you fucking child and hold her and let her know that she'll be okay!"

I turned and looked at Wonho, finally screaming at him. "I can't! I can't see her! I can't do anything for her!" Wonho furrowed his eyebrows. I sighed softly, pulling my phone out. "After I told Jae to go back to the hospital, this is what he said." I let him see my phone, folding my arms slightly.

"You're hiding something from me as well as your depression, anxiety and suicidal tendencies. Minhyuk, I have no choice but to call CPS. Gain custody over Sariyah. At least until you tell me what's going on?" Wonho looked up at me. "Oh, Minhyuk..."

I shook my head, tears rolling down my face. "I love my little girl... I love her so much. And she's about to be gone. And I can't do anything. I have no means of fighting Jae. The moment the judge hears that I'm a streetwalker, It's over for me." I looked down at my feet. "I didn't even know Jae was doing this until I texted Kihyun earlier." Wonho and I stood in silence for a while.

"I-" Wonho sighed. He was at a loss for words. He shook his head, holding me tightly and kissed me roughly. I pulled away for a second. "I have condoms here."

I scoffed a bit. "So," I pushed him off. "You criticize me, accuse me of giving you an STD, a fucking deadly STD... And to make up for me being a mopey little bitch, you decide it's time to fuck me? No, sir. That's what we're not gonna fucking do " I heard Jooheon upstairs groaning and crying this time. "Can I still have the Traverse? I'm going home." Wonho nodded, going to get the keys as I went upstairs.

Jooheon was sitting up in bed, holding himself. As I got closer to him, I noticed him grabbing at his arms. Jooheon croaked out the sound of an S. It sounded like he was trying to tell someone to stop. "Shhh," I whispered, getting closer to him. "Okay, I'm gonna take you to my house, okay? You trust me?" Jooheon wouldn't let go of himself, even if I tried to pry his arms away. I decided to sit in front of him, holding him tightly as he cried.

I whispered into his ear, hoping that it'd calm him down somehow. Nothing was working. At a loss, I sat in Jooheon's lap, laying his head on my chest and putting his hands on my sides. I took deep stable breaths, trying to help him out. Slowly but surely, Jooheon relaxed, hands draping around my back as he began breathing as steadily as I was. I smiled softly, "There you go, baby... Nice and easy." Jooheon whined, gripping onto my waist. "Come on, let's go, I got you," I mumbled, getting up and picking Jooheon up. I turned around to see Wonho at the door.

"Does he just not talk?" Wonho asked.

I shrugged. "I've never heard him speak." I grabbed Jooheon's phone and my bag. "Him and Taeyong are the more innocent ones, but they're getting corrupted by Brian and..." I sighed softly. "He's breaking them. He couldn't break me and Changkyun the way he's breaking them. He's obliterating them and who they used to be." I furrowed my eyebrows, holding Jooheon as I left the room. "Why do you suddenly care?"

Wonho shrugged a bit. "I just... He looks so helpless and broken." He looked between the both of us. "I know you're strong, and you can deal with a lot. And I know that if you take him home, you're basically gonna be raising a baby again." I rolled my eyes, rushing past him. "Let me help you," Wonho yelled in a last ditch effort to get me to stay.

I turned to look at him before heading downstairs. "You wanna help me now? Now you wanna fucking help me?" I began yelling, getting furious. I scared Jooheon and he began crying again. I shook my head, taking him downstairs as Wonho followed me. I decided to set him down in the living room. "I love how you wanna help me with a grown ass man..." I laughed a bit, clapping my hands once. "You wanna help me with a grown ass man, but you wouldn't help me with Sariyah. You decided to go fuck around with that fucking- I don't even know what to call him. That disgusting fucking human being, but no. Now you wanna help me with a grown ass fucking man." 

Wonho scoffed a bit. "Who the fuck are you calling a disgusting human being? You sleep with men for money." I balled my hands up into fists, trying to keep my composure.

"You're so fucking bipolar, Wonho, it's not even fucking funny." I tried to pick Jooheon up again but he was too afraid of me by now.

Wonho finally broke. Tears just pouring from his eyes. "I'm. Fucking. Dying! Minhyuk, I'm fucking dying. I don't know what I want, what I feel, all I know is I'm dying. And I have no one to be angry at except myself. But I can't stand the idea of being angry at me. Stop giving Hyungwon shit."

I shook my head. "He took my fucking boyfriend away from me. The one person I romantically loved after Neveah, don't fucking tell me to stop giving him shit. And he not only took you away from me for the moment, he took you away forever, because I didn't fucking give you the disease. That's what you wanna think. That's what you believe, regardless of what you know." After I finished talking, I tried to help Jooheon calm down again. "Hey, honey, I'm sorry... I won't yell like that again, I promise. You wanna go? Can you trust me?" Jooheon didn't know what to do, but he wanted to make me happy and just go with what I said. I could tell. As he wrapped his arms around me, the front door opened.

Wonho looked and his face fell. I knew who it was. "Hey baby, I'm ho-" Hyungwon froze to see me in the house, looking back at Wonho. I froze to see that I actually knew him. 

"I can explain," Wonho said, beginning to plead his case.

Hyungwon furrowed his eyebrows, putting his hand up. "No, you keep your mouth fucking shut." A fire ignited deep within my chest. "What the fuck do you have your goddamn ex in my fucking house for?" He was mad. He was past mad. 

I shook my head, "I needed his help with him," I looked down at Jooheon. "A friend of mine needed help and he was the closest person to me to have a car. The moment I can get him calm again, I'll leave." Wonho's eyes began to well up with tears again. He mouthed a thank you while Hyungwon was glaring at me. It made a little bit more sense to me why he was being so defensive.

"Baby, go get in the shower," Wonho said, cuddling up to Hyungwon, giving him a kiss. "I'll be there in a minute, okay?" Hyungwon nodded, walking into their bedroom. After Wonho heard their bathroom door close, he picked up Jooheon, causing him to scream. "Shh, baby... I'm so sorry, but we gotta get you outta here quickly, okay? I'm sorry." He started rushing him outside to the car, Jooheon's screams turning back into wailing cries. I rushed out with him.

I closed the front door. "What are you doing? Are you leaving with me?"

Wonho shook his head, "I can't." He put Jooheon in the front seat, giving him a blanket he'd left in the back seat. "Hey, when you go to sleep, Jooheon?" Jooheon wouldn't look at him. "Hey, honey, listen to me. Shhh. When you go to sleep, you'll be safe. When you wake up, you'll be safe. Minhyuk's got you okay? Trust him." Jooheon slowly nodded, tears still falling, the sounds ceasing.

"Hey," I shut Jooheon's door, pulling Wonho closer to me. "If he's hurting you, I'll fucking kill him." It wasn't an empty threat in the slightest. "You get your ass to my house. I may hate you, but I love you more than I hate you. I got you too, Wonho." I looked at the house before leaning in and giving him a kiss. I walked over to the driver's side, getting in. As I turned on the car, Jooheon began crying harder. The sound of a car was even a trigger to him. I needed to figure this kid out. I pulled off, trying to find the brightest path home while it was still kinda dark.

When I finally pulled into my driveway, there was Kihyun's car there. "The hell?" I asked softly. I stopped the car and got out to get Jooheon. As I approached my front door, there Kihyun was holding Taeyong. He looked up at me, him also crying.

"I-I'm so fucking sorry," he started. "Minhyuk, I'm sorry... I-" I hushed him up, opening the front door for him and Taeyong. "Taeyong... I left him in the house alone. I was on the phone with Brian and then I saw smoke and light coming from the kitchen. He's okay for right now. If he gets worse... I-I don't know."

I nodded, closing the door. "I think Jooheon and Taeyong found comfort in each other. Let's take them to the guest room." Kihyun nodded as I led the way. We laid them down next to each other and almost instantly, Jooheon clung onto Taeyong. As we.left the room, I took a deep breath. "Now, I'm fucking exhausted. I got into a huge fight with my ex, his boyfriend clearly has him by the balls, I've been waking up every other hour to take care of Jooheon, Sariyah's not gonna be in my custody by next week, I have no reason to keep going, but I'm going the fuck to sleep instead of going right back upstairs to where Jae hid the knife again." I headed toward my room.

Kihyun nodded. "I'll sleep here, if you don't mind?" 

I laughed at him. "Bitch, you act like you haven't fucked me before," I pointed to my room. "You act like this is the most taboo thing we've ever done, get in bed." I sighed, going through my room to my bathroom, at least washing my face before changing into my pajamas. "And grab one of my shirts and shorts. You're not sleeping in my bed naked tonight." I came back into my room, effectively switching places with Kihyun. I yawned, putting my phone on the charger, and taking out my contacts. "Hey, Kihyun can you do me a favor as well?" I asked.

"What's up?" He asked, coming out of the bathroom.

I looked up at him, a bit of reality setting in as my own tears began to fall. "Remind me to get tested tomorrow." Kihyun furrowed his eyebrows. "I know my ex's boyfriend... He was a customer of ours." Kihyun began to ask and I shook my head. "That's all I'm saying. He'd been a customer of ours." I turned my bedside lamp off, turning my back to Kihyun. 

As the other light turned off, I felt Kihyun wrap his arms around me. I let my guard down, melting into tears. "Shhh, it's okay. Let it go..." He sighed. "I'll fix it, I promise." And for whatever reason, I trusted him.


	12. × twelve ×

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kihyun relieves some of his own pressure with a secret and relates to Minhyuk all in one.

I couldn't sleep. I let Minhyuk calm down and get to sleep before I got up to pace the room. Irene had legal actions against me, I ruined the lives of four young men, I was determine to significantly harm a fifth, and I was no saint myself. I sighed softly, calling Irene. "What do you want?" Irene asked. 

I sighed softly. "Why do you insist on this? I haven't done a damn thing to you and you know it."

I heard Irene's chuckle. "Exactly. I fucking love you Kihyun. And I'm so goddamn sorry that I couldn't be enough for you. You won't even touch me the way you used to." I rolled my eyes knowing exactly where this was going.

I bit my lip. "Sammy is not the reason I won't touch you." I sat down at my desk.

"Then what is?" Irene asked.

I knew I'd regret it within the week, but I laid it on the line. "I have so much shit I'm dealing with, Irene and I'm falling for different people. And I can't give you what I used to."

Irene's voice got lower. "You're falling for other people because of Sammy. You're leaving me because of Sammy. You're using him as an excuse to leave. I'm a failure, admit it." I hung up, throwing my phone down. I needed something. I looked in Minhyuk's drawers, obliterating his privacy. Right next to his drugs was a picture of him and Neveah. I picked it up just to be greeted with her funeral program:

Neveah Jade Lee  
Sunrise: Saturday, July 16, 1994  
Sunset: Friday, December 20, 2013

I opened it up as I pulled out a joint. I quickly lit it before reading her obituary, which wasn't long at all:

Neveah "Veya" Jade Lee (née Bonner) died unexpectedly in her home on Friday, December 20, 2013 in Northridge, California at the age of 19.

"Holy fuck," I mumbled. I knew Minhyuk and Neveah were a young couple, I just didn't realize how young. I continued reading:

Neveah is survived by her parents, Destiny and Michael Bonner of Keizer, Oregon, brother, Anthony Bonner of Keizer, Oregon, sister, Taralynn Bonner-Robinson of Keizer, Oregon, husband, Minhyuk Lee of Northridge, California, daughter, Sariyah Brooke Lee of Northridge, California, aunt, Trinity Simmons of Corvallis, Oregon. She is preceded in death by paternal grandmother, Amaya Jordan of Corvallis, Oregon, maternal grandfather, James Tennille of Baker, Oregon.

Her dedication pages were what were the longest. All of which, written by Minhyuk:

Neveah Jade Bonner, my lovely wife, was a kind spirit, made like the heavenly angel she is. She never gave less than her all. From the moment I moved to Corvallis and met her, she never lost my attention. Her smile, her laugh, her glowing presence. I wanted to keep those attributes bright and protect them with my entire life. And I fell short. Our daughter, I can already tell, she holds her smile, her laugh and her glowing presence. Heaven gained their angel again and as much as I want to fault God for this, I know she's in the best place she can be. I love you so much, Neveah. Sariyah loves you too. We'll be joined once again one day, and I promise to protect Sariyah with my final breath. But please, please watch over me. Rest easy, my love.

I didn't realize I was crying until Minhyuk spoke up. "What are you weeping for?" He chuckled, sitting up. I turned around looking at him and his face fell. "The fuck were you doing in my drawer?" I flashed the joint in my hand as he got up, snatching the program out of my hand. 

"Neveah is beautiful," I said. Minhyuk rolled his eyes at me. "Why do you hide her?"

That sparked anger. "I don't fucking hide her." I looked around his room. No pictures of her were out in the open.

I picked up the photo they had together in his drawer. He was picking her up as she wrapped her body around him, looking at him lovingly. "There's nothing like this around, Minhyuk. You guys had to be, what 17 here? It's a beautiful photo, and you don't let any of it show." Minhyuk sighed as he set the program on the bed.

"We were 18, me probably 19..." He said. I handed him the photo and he sniffled a bit. "This... This was pregnancy picture. A few days after we found out, we began taking pictures." It was obvious that what I'd said was hitting him hard. He got up and grabbed a couple books. "This," he handed me a pastel pink book. "This is the pregnancy photo album. And I can't look at it as often as I do this one." He pointed to the deep red one in his hands. "This is from friends to boyfriend and girlfriend, boyfriend and girlfriend to husband and wife. I can easily look at this one. And I do it all the time. But I cannot look at that one."

I opened the album and first, a picture of them holding up the pregnancy test, all the focus there while they shared a kiss in the blurred background. I skimmed through the book, watching the progression. Every picture was beautiful and smiling. When I got to a certain point, it showed that the smiles were decreasing. "What's... What's happening here?" I asked.

Minhyuk noticed where I was. "This is why I can't look at it. After her funeral, I sat here in my room, staring at these pictures. And I went through that album at least seven times. And I noticed what I didn't notice when she was alive." Minhyuk grabbed a few notebooks. "Here's how she wrote during the pregnancy in the beginning. All about how perfect life was, how blessed she was, how much she already loved her baby and that Mama w-was always gonna be th-there." His tears started again as he handed it off. Then he flipped to the last written on page of the third book. "This is how she wrote before she stopped. Talking about how tired she was, she kept apologizing to Sariyah. She said, 'I promised that Mama was always gonna be there... But I've already fucked you up and I don't think you need me much longer.' And I didn't catch any of this until after we fucking buried her." And then he pulled out the last piece of paper. "This. This was her apology to me. She said she loved me truly. And she knew I did to. But I couldn't save her..." He took a breath before bursting into tears again. "She told me things she'd never told me at all in our five, six years together. Never told me all the shit she dealt with and she did it all alone. She died alone." I put the books down on his dresser, and I pulled him into a tight hug.

"I'm sorry, Minhyuk, I really am..." I never intended to make him feel bad. That's all I seem to do anyway. Minhyuk pulled away and looked at me and he leaned in to kiss me. I didn't fight him at all on it either. I owed him a lot, but for right now, if this is what he wanted, that's what he could get. 

It got hot and heavy pretty quickly, Minhyuk pulling my shirt off of me. Then it all stopped. "Fuck!" Minhyuk yelled, pushing away from me. I let go of him as he turned around. "What the fuck am I doing?" He yelled. "I-I'm a terrible father, I sleep with men to get money, I sleep with men to forget, I fell in love with a man who fucking left me and is on his death bed, and I could be on the same death bed because his fucking... I don't even know what, of a boyfriend, slept with us and I-" Minhyuk began hyperventilating, and I laid him down on the floor, helping him stretch out.

"Shh, hey..." I whispered. I reached up on the chair next to us, grabbing my wallet. "I don't know the exact pain you've gone through, but I know a bit of it. Except I didn't lose a wife." I grabbed his hand, breathing evenly, hoping he'd notice enough to try to breathe with me. I pulled out a small photo out of my wallet. "I didn't lose a wife, but I lost a son." Minhyuk started to calm down, enough to listen to me probably. "I lost a son. We named him Samuel. The first sign that we were gonna lose him is when we noticed a big spot on the sonogram. It wasn't a tumor, it was where another baby should've been. Irene wasn't worried at all about it. I was, though and she never listened to the doctor's advice. Taking it easy, eating different things. She ended up giving birthday at 16 weeks. It wasn't a miscarriage. Samuel was born and even though he couldn't open his eyes, he had all ten fingers and toes, he had all the fight in the world. We had him for almost a week before he went. And I knew he had fight in him. We thought he was going the next day, then the next day. On day four, he was struggling. On day six, he was still hanging on and it was like he needed our permission to go. Irene left me at the hospital with him. Didn't even witness his last few moments. It was hard, so I tried to understand it but I honestly still cannot wrap my head around it. He was waiting for his mom before he went. You know what I told him?" Minhyuk shook his head, breathing slowed almost completely. "It's okay, son. You made us proud. We love you. Mama's not here but she loves you. And I love you so, so much. You can go baby, it's fine." My own tears started to fall. "And minutes later, he passed away in my arms." I bit my lip softly. "Now, you know that, and you know how fucking shitty I am, in general. So I don't wanna hear anymore fucking bullshit of how terrible you are. You aren't terrible in the slightest. Anyone who's ever had a child should want to be the best they ever could be and what do I do? I'm a cutthroat businessman by day, a down-low dirty dog by night. Don't you ever sit here and call yourself a bad father. You are doing what you have to do to give that little girl of yours the best quality of life she could have. Yes, you sleep with men for money. Yes, you're terrified of having an STD. Yes, you fell in love with a man. Yes, you tried to move on from Neveah. Yes, you currently don't have your daughter. But you need help, you cannot do it alone. Let me fucking help you, Minhyuk. I'm getting you out, I'm getting everyone out. But I will not just get you out and leave you. I've seen the worst in all of you and if everyone in your lives decide to leave you, I will not. I'll die by that, Minhyuk, do you understand me?"

Minhyuk nodded, sniffling a bit. "I-I understand." I sat him up, holding him tightly, running my hand through his hair. It helped him calm down. 

"Go clean yourself up, put on a dress shirt and pants, tie as well." I said softly.

Minhyuk furrowed his eyesbrows. "Why? It's 7AM, we should go back to sleep."

I shook my head. "I didn't sleep. But you're one of the easiest to get out. I'll start with you. Congratulations. As of today, you've been hired by Yoo Enterprises. You start work today as an secretary intern." The look on Minhyuk's face was priceless. I chuckled softly. "Go!" He nodded, going to take a shower.

I sighed a bit, worrying about him a lot. His anxiety and stress was a lot and I was hoping I didn't have to put another one of these boys in the hospital. Changkyun was coming back tomorrow, I was signing him up for his GED test and enrolling him in college after that. Taeyong needed rehab. Jooheon, I didn't know what he needed. It was a mountain of shit that I'd buried myself under. But I fucked up. I had to fix it all.


	13. 》thirteen《

Kihyun sent his driver, Shownu, to come pick me up from the hospital. While Kihyun set Minhyuk up for work, he was gonna be like my fucking babysitter. I wasn't complaining though, I wanted to get better. Seeing my mother made me want to make it in life, just to show her that I never needed her. To show her that her boo thing couldn't break me down and to make her feel a little bit worse every time I succeeded. Maybe those were all of the wrong reasons, but it was enough.

I signed out of the hospital, taking my discharge papers to the front. My birthday was within the next week or so, they didn't find the need to call Kihyun for consent. "Hello, Mr. Lim," Shownu smiled at me as I walked out of the hospital. I bowed slightly, following him to the car. "Do you want breakfast before you go home?" 

I shrugged a bit. "I'm not exactly hungry. What am I doing at home though?" I asked.

"You and I," Shownu said, opening the car door. "Are studying for your GED test."

I got in and sighed softly. I hated school, I hated studying. I didn't want to do this. But going to rehab wasn't my forte either. I didn't need it. When Shownu got in the car, I took a deep breath. "I don't need rehab, I won't go to rehab," I mumbled. "I'm not a junkie, I'm not Taeyong, I will not go to rehab." Shownu glanced over at me as he started the car.

"That's a bit biased," Shownu said, pulling out of the parking lot. "I'm sure Taeyong doesn't want rehab either. I'm positive he doesn't want to be a junkie either. I'm assuming you're upset right now, but you shouldn't just throw someone else under the bus. You overdosed, twice. That doesn't make you a druggie, it makes you suicidal. And you know it, Minhyuk knows it, Brian knows it and Kihyun knows it. That's why he's getting you on the road to some sort of education." When I started to cry, more or less due to overwhelming emotions, he just sort of shrugged. "If you can't handle hearing that, don't say anything that harsh, it can and will come back to you." I nodded, wiping a tear away. 

It was a silent ride back to a house I didn't recognize. "The hell?" I asked softly. 

"There was a small fire at Kihyun's yesterday. You can go back within the week." Shownu began to get out. "He's living with Minhyuk right now, that's where we are."

As we got out, I looked around. Minhyuk's house was nice. "I'm sorry," I mumbled. "About what I said." I felt bad about it, partially because he called me out on my shit.

"It's fine," Shownu shrugged. "Just don't drag my nephew through the mud more than he already does."

My eyes widened. "Time out, you're his uncle... But you let him fall into the ring?" I asked.

Shownu kinda stared blankly at me. "He's my nephew but he's a grown ass man. He can do what he pleases." I scoffed, rolling my eyes as I walked to the front door. If only he pleased to do so. Brian got Taeyong completely fucked up. He saw him on the street, he needed a place to stay for the night. That's how it started. He only stayed because he felt like he owed Brian... That and Brian beating him. I decided to keep my mouth shut, following Shownu inside.

We studied all throughout the day, up to about five in the evening. "Well, I guess I should get going. I have to go pick Kihyun and Minhyuk up," he shrugged.

I cocked my head a bit, looking at him. "I mean... You don't have to." I couldn't focus on any of my studying. I had to admit, Shownu was eye-catching. Even though we studied for seven hours, I retained nothing. I got closer to him, uncomfortably close for his taste, probably. 

"I probably should," he said, standing up. "And you probably shouldn't try to fuck me so soon after your release. You're sober right now kid, you gotta stay sober and keep your head on straight." Shownu grabbed my bag. "Let's go." He was so strict, but instead of scaring me, it annoyed me. Maybe I was finally being a teenager, annoyed with their guardian. I rolled my eyes following him out to the car.

We waited for Kihyun and Minhyuk to come out and the moment I saw them, I burst into laughter. Minhyuk looked fucked up, Kihyun looking fine and smug. As soon as they got into the car, I took a deep breath. "Next time, stand up. Minhyuk, your hair is a mess." I brushed it down in the back as he just glared at me.

"It's my first day, leave me alone!" He whined.

I chuckled a bit. "No, dude." I tried to fix his hair a bit more. "Seriously, it's your first day, but you shouldn't be that slutty intern. You're not Irene."

Kihyun shot daggers at me, quickly irritated. "First of fucking all, we didn't fuck. Second of all, you don't get to address either Minhyuk nor Irene like that. And finally, he had a fucking anxiety attack because one of my employees works with him now and he doesn't want to be near him. So why don't you keep quiet?" I was speechless, my breath hitching in my throat. 

"Hey," Shownu mumbled. "Lay off the kid, he just came home. And I let him have one earlier. He didn't mean any harm..." I threw my earbuds in, tears quickly streaming down my face.

I didn't mean to make anyone upset. I shrunk into my corner of the backseat, pulling out my math book, doing some homework. Minhyuk tapped my leg before pulling my earbuds. "I'm sorry," Kihyun said, sounding as if he'd repeated it a lot.

I shook my head. "It's fine," i sniffled, putting my earbuds back in. It was a long ride back home.


	14. × fourteen ×

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As Kihyun, Shownu and the boys come home, they realize something urgent.

"They slept all day?" I asked, begging Minhyuk to hurry up and unlock the door.

Shownu shrugged, just now realizing what the fuck he'd just told me. "I-I didn't even know they were fucking here!" He began pushing through Changkyun to be with me. "Oh God... Oh my God!"

Minhyuk kept fumbling with his keys and my patience grew thin. "Can you fucking open the door any fucking slower?" I yelled.

"I am fucking try-" He struggled too much with the key. I grabbed it and slammed my body against the door, finally loosening the locking mechanism enough for it to slip.

Shownu and I ran upstairs, rushing into the guest room. "Tae?" I asked, shaking him. "Jooheon?" The fact that neither of them were waking up was screwing me up. My chest was tightening, my face was burning... I couldn't breathe. Minhyuk pushed his way through, Changkyun pulling me back to him, holding me tightly. "Fuck!" I screamed out, tears falling fast.

Changkyun shushed me, bringing me to the wall, out of Minhyuk and Shownu's way. "Hey honey," Minhyuk mumbled, scooping Jooheon up into his arms. Shownu did the same, pulling Taeyong to sit up. "Can you wake up for me?"

I was too late. I tried to save them all way too late. We never took them to the hospital, Brian could've broken a rib and it could've punctured a lung. Taeyong could've inhaled too much smoke. Jooheon could've had a panic attack so big that it sent him into cardiac arrest, like mine was probably doing right now. All the worst thoughts were going through my head at this point. "Shh, hey... Kihyun, you gotta breathe." Changkyun pat my back, rocking side to side.

"Tae, come on, kid..." Shownu mumbled. "I-I got you kid, just wake up... Come on." He even began crying.

Within a few moments, I heard Taeyong choking on something. When I looked up, I saw him throw up, coughing until he was done. I took a deep breath before realizing Jooheon hadn't woken up yet. Minhyuk put his hand on his chest... Then he shifted to the side of his neck. "Come on, honey... You're okay. No one can hurt you. You trust me right? Then you can wake up and you'll be safe. You gotta trust me and wake up though," Minhyuk was slowly losing his composure as he rocked Jooheon softly. "Uhm... Kihyun?" He asked softly, covering his ears. "Calmly go downstairs with Changkyun... Kyunnie, go grab the box that's on top the refrigerator. Grab a paring knife." My jaw dropped a bit, shaking my head. "No, trust me. Go get it, please. And Kihyun, call 911, okay?" 

My emotions were running way too high. He was too young, slightly older than Changkyun but way too young to die. He couldn't die. And Minhyuk was insane if he fucking thought that cutting him was gonna do anything. I did what I was told, calling 911, I just said I had an unconscious person here. I didn't know what to say. As soon as I hung up, I rushed back upstairs. Minhyuk had Jooheon on the ground, a towel under him and he took the knife, cutting his shirt down the middle. "Fuck..." He mumbled. His entire chest was bruised. He grabbed a bottle of betadine he kept around, pouring it on his chest and the knife. "Alright, if you're worried or squeamish, look away now." Changkyun grabbed me, trying to get me to change my gaze. I couldn't look away. He went ahead and cut his chest down the center, blood gushing to the floor. Jooheon almost shot up, taking a deep breath and his eye widening. He began to moan, not really in pain, but in his general panicked stated. "There you go honey, Minhyuk shushed, quickly throwing a towel over his chest, straddling him to gain better pressure. "Hey, what's one of your favorite songs? If you don't really have one, I'll sing one for you okay?" Jooheon had noticed that he was bleeding at this point. He spoke a few words, words I couldn't hear. "By J. Cole?" Minhyuk asked. Jooheon hummed happily. "Changkyun... You wanna help me? Can we sing Apparently?" 

Changkyun let go of me, walking and kneeling by Jooheon's head. They shot each other a look before beginning the song. "I keep my head high, I got my wings to carry me. I don't know freedom, I want my dreams to rescue me. I keep my faith strong, I ask the Lord to follow me. I've been unfaithful, I don't know why you call on me."

Changkyun took over the rapping. Minhyuk smiled at Jooheon, Jooheon smiling back, hearing how Changkyun rapped. "This is my canvas. I'mma paint it how I want it baby. his is my canvas I'mma paint it, paint it, paint it, how I want it."

We heard the emergency responders call out for us. I shouted over the landing, calling them up. "Fuck you 'cause there, there is no right or wrong. Only a song. I like to write alone, be in my zone."

Changkyun looked up to see the responders. He continued rapping softly to Jooheon as Minhyuk told them what was happening.

"They've been asleep all day. Him over there is going through a detox and he just kinda choked on his own vomit. This one, his chest was completely bruised and he wasn't breathing. Hemothorax, I think. I cut his chest, but not nearly deep enough to hurt his internal organs. Just enough to relieve the pressure on his chest." The paramedics took over, Minhyuk switching positions with one of them. 

They evaluated Jooheon and tried to take him away without someone with him. That's where he started flipping out, moaning and screaming. "Hey, hey, hey!" The paramedics set him down on the gurney, preparing to strap him down.

"No!" Minhyuk yelled. "Just take me with you... He can't be by himself and if you strap him, you're gonna hurt him. He's gonna fight you." Jooheon had tears in his eyes as he shook, looking around like a wild, shot deer. "Shh, honey I'm here... I promise you, I'm here. We're going together, okay? Nod for me, sweetheart." Jooheon slowly nodded, grabbing onto Minhyuk. 

As they left, I took a deep breath, sliding down onto the floor. "You good, Kihyun?" Shownu asked, holding Taeyong tightly.

I shook my head. "I-I uhm... I'm gonna go ahead and uhm... Go work on something." I headed to the office area Minhyuk had, working on my case against Irene. I had to print our messages, I had to download our recorded conversations. I had so much to do, as well as get someone over to my house to fix it up, and getting Jooheon and Taeyong therapy. And dealing with Brian. It was no surprise to me that breathing was becoming harder and harder.


	15. | fifteen |

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Minhyuk lets all his skeletons out of the closet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Minhyuk talks about Mr. Oh. This includes rape and abuse. Viewer discretion is advised.

"This is your stop, sir." A paramedic said, causing me to stop short of the door.

Jooheon had been sedated long ago. "I'll be there when you wake up, Jooheon. I promise." As they disappeared down the operating hall, I turned and head toward the waiting room. 

Traffic had come and go for hours on end. I was beginning to fall asleep until I heard a familiar voice. "What are you doing here?" I looked up sleepily to see Jae staring at me. "I know you aren't here for your fucking daughter."

I scoffed, not even attempting to be civil. "You know what, I'm getting real sick of you acting like I'm the shittiest father to walk the earth. I can't be there for her because of you..." My fuse was short. "I'm here for Jooheon and keeping Kihyun updated on him." My phone rang out as a call from Kihyun came in. As I walked outside to take the call, Jae followed me.

"What's your damn concern with Kihyun?" He asked. "I'm sick and tired of hearing your boss's name come out of your mouth. What the fuck is the deal with him?" I put my phone on speaker, taking a deep breath.

I took a minute to look at him and decide if it was the right time. "Kihyun's my fucking pimp. Okay, Jae?" I just came out with it. "I'm a slut, Jae. I have sex with guys for money. To pay for Neveah's funeral costs and for Sariyah's hospital bills. I've been doing it for a while now."

Jae began laughing a bit. "And you couldn't ask me for help for why? Huh? Why, Minhyuk?" He asked. I couldn't ask him for financial help. It was up to me to make it happen for my daughter. "Oh," he nodded. "Oh, you fucking like it. You like letting men use you." Kihyun's voice came in to me as white noise. I couldn't understand it as anger and pain fueled me.

"If one more fucking person tells me I like being used, abused, beaten, raped, drugged one more fucking time I might just kill the motherfucker." I yelled. "No, being a prostitute is dirty, it makes me feel fucking filthy. I can't fucking stand it. It makes me feel wrong. But you know what Jae?" I chuckled softly. "I'd lay down and fucking die for that little girl in there. So I'm sorry I'm not by her bedside, driving myself insane. I'm sorry that I work by sleeping with people for money. Take my daughter away from me. She'd probably be better off anyway, yeah? At least that's what you fucking think." 

I was interrupted by Kihyun's voice. I forgot I was even talking to him. "Hey, calm down, I'm on the way. Okay?" I just hung up instead.

Jae looked away from me for a bit. "No, I don't like being a prostitute. Because at any given moment, I'll see one of those men, the evil ones. I'll see them around more than I would any other people. Because they too live double lives." I slowly began to think back on the day. It was about time I finally broke. "Before I walk away and act like I never fucking saw your backstabbing ass, how's my daughter, the one I do all of this for?" I asked. I couldn't make a dramatic exit without asking about her. It'd only prove Jae right.

He bit his lip softly. "She's supposed to be coming home tomorrow. I came to sign her release papers. They told me you were served with the power of attorney paperwork, were you?"

I shook my head. "And even if I was, I wouldn't sign it. You're her godfather, you're her third parent. The parent after both have proven completely incapable of taking care of her. Neveah's gone but I'm not fucking dead yet. And it'll be a freezing cold day in Hell if I sign her over to you before I crash and burn." I was pissed and hurt as whole, but Jae was tired of me.

"You dumb fuck," he scoffed before getting loud. "You are suicidal. You just fucking told me you sleep with men for money, that's illegal. Do you really think you'll ever take Sariyah home ever again? You know damn well you won't. It's not even fathomable for you at this point. Especially if a social worker heard about this. The moment a nurse hears you talking about prostitution, it will get back to a social worker and you will lose her." 

My eyes widened as tears began to flow. "Jae, I swear to God, you're not about to fucking take her away from me." He wouldn't. I haven't harmed her and I've done nothing but try to keep us afloat. He just began walking inside the hospital. "Jae!" I screamed, following behind him.

As we entered the hospital, I was stopped by a doctor from the ICU. "Did you accompany Lee Jooheon here?" I nodded slowly, catching a glance at Jae walking away. "Come with me," the doctor nodded. I sighed softly, following him. He led me to Jooheon's room. "He's stable, he should be able to go home by tomorrow. You did a brave thing... Risky, but brave. I don't think he would've survived if you didn't do anything. Paramedics said he had that blood and the pressure building up for well over 24 hours and it was building fast. He should be okay to go in a few days after we monitor him."

I smiled softly, seeing how calmly Jooheon had been sleeping. "Thank you, doctor. He's had it rough... We all have." I walked to his bedside, holding his hand slightly. Even in his unconscious state, he squeezed my hand softly as if I was going somewhere. "I'm not leaving you. We're gonna get you back... You can stay with me and my daughter, it's fine. When you wake up, you have a place to go." I let go of his hand, reaching for my phone. Kihyun was calling me, telling me he was here. "I have to go, Jooheon, okay? You can come home soon, okay?" Of course he didn't respond but I still had to reassure him.

I thanked the doctor as I headed to the parking lot. As I got into the car, Kihyun was immediately tired of my shit. "You tell me right fucking now who the fuck hurt you guys. All of you are hiding it from me. And Brian let it happen. So tell me what fucking happened now."

I sighed softly, bracing myself. I didn't want to speak, but at the same time, the younger ones most definitely wouldn't speak. "We had a customer. And he was just abusive. He'd already paid so, according to Brian, we had to do whatever he wanted. He was extremely rough and I hated every part of it. He wouldn't let Changkyun breathe. He has scars on his ass from the belt he was hitting us with. He hit us so hard it split skin. He beat him. He beat me. He beat Taeyong." Tears were incessant at this point. "When I saw Taeyong crying... I let myself be used. I couldn't let him touch him again. I couldn't let him touch Changkyun again either. He went overboard, angry he didn't have a choice anymore. And I was abused more. Mr. Oh, that's what we called him." Kihyun was on the highway now, and he glanced over at me.

"Was that not his fucking name?" He yelled, angry at the story. I shook my head. "Who was it, Minhyuk?" He said, switching lanes.

I took a deep breath before letting the forbidden name fall out of my lips. "Hyungwon." Kihyun almost stopped before realizing he was on the highway. He quickly exited off the highway, heading to a place I didn't know. "What are you d-"

Kihyun cut me off. "I know where those sons of bitches live." I shrunk back in my seat, truly afraid of Kihyun for once in my life.


	16. 》sixteen《

Shownu decided to take Taeyong to the hospital. That way, we could keep an eye out for Jooheon. Minhyuk texted us and told us they had to leave. He needed help anyway. Shownu went to stay with Taeyong while I decided that Jooheon needed someone by his side as he woke up. It took an hour or so but he woke up, whining. "Hey," I spoke lowly, walking to his bedside. "Hey, it's Kyunnie. Minhyuk had to go somewhere." Jooheon didn't like that answer, crying harder. He was sending himself into a terrible panic. I decided to read his chart, which was probably illegal. But I was glad I read it. "Oh shit," I rushed over to his call button. Jooheon began to choke from hyperventilating. He also was having arrhythmias. That's why it took him so long to get out of surgery.

"What's going on?" The doctor came in, pushing me off to the side.

I was so scared, I couldn't speak. Because as soon as the doctor touched him, Jooheon screamed like a murderer was behind me. And soon, the screaming subsided into nothingness. But he was far from down having an episode. His body slouched down the bed as he began to seize, almost hitting his head on the guardrail. "I don't know! He woke up from a night terror and I wasn't the guy who brought him in so he began to panic even more and he began to choke and hyperventilate." I looked at Jooheon and he looked miserable. He hadn't lost consciousness and the sight was horrifying to watch. He began to scream bloody fucking murder. It began to send me into my own panic. "Wh-What the fuck is happening to him?" I  
Tears followed that sentence as I backed up into a wall.

The doctor called for more help. "Kid, do you have someone who can come get you? You don't wanna watch this for much longer..." The doctor froze a bit, glancing up at the clock. "Shit..." He held Jooheon on his side so he didn't choke. "When's the last time he ate anything?" I shook my head, not knowing the answer. "He's suffering from a physiological nonepileptic seizure. And that means something else in his body is out of control. His cardiac arrhythmia is probably the main cause... But it's... Kid, go find the guy you came in with."

I listened to the doctor, rushing out of the room. As I began looking for Shownu, I covered my ears and closed my eyes, effectively walking blindly. "Hey..." I felt someone grab me. "What's going on, Kyunnie?" It was Minhyuk.

I shook my head, crying my eyes out. I leaned my head into his chest, trying to calm myself down. "Jooheon... He's so bad. It's so bad."

I felt Minhyuk hold his breath. "What do you mean?" He began to walk back to the room.

"No!" I yelled. "Don't take me back... I can't see it anymore." I begged Minhyuk.

He sighed. "Changkyun, I have to watch after him. I promised." He began to run back to the room.

As we approached the room, Jooheon's screaming hadn't stopped and his seizure was coming to an end. But he was still panicking. "Mmm..." He whined. He was trying to speak. "Min... Min." Minhyuk walked over to his side. "Min-Min, no leave. No leave, no leave."

The doctor sighed softly. "Damn, his language is affected... We'll have to scan him." He began to take down his vitals.

Minhyuk immediately became defensive. "His language isn't affected, this is how he talks. He doesn't talk in full sentences. He barely talks at all." Jooheon grabbed Minhyuk's hand for dear life, afraid to lose him.

The doctor seemed intrigued by this. "Why?" He asked.

Finally, something I knew. "He wasn't taught to speak, really at all. Brian said he found him within like three miles of the homeless shelter and he was trying to write, but he couldn't. Eumsig-eul wihae mueos-ideun hal geos-ibnida, will do anything for food. He couldn't even spell half the words. It was clear he had little to no education. Whenever he speaks saying 'Kyunnie' is too hard for him, so he says 'Yunnie', and the Hyu sound is hard for him to say. So, Minhyuk is Min or Min-Min, I'm Yunnie, Kihyun is Ki or Kiki, Taeyong is Tae or Tae-Tae and Brian is just... Bad man." Minhyuk didn't know any of that. He just stood shocked.

"So, he doesn't really have a fear of talking?" He asked, letting his hand softly caress Jooheon's face.

I shook my head. "No, he just doesn't know how to. He's smart though. He doesn't like to leave our two syllable names on only one syllable, so he repeats it, if possible."

Minhyuk sighed softly. "He's like a child, isn't he? Like... With every aspect of life except maybe taking a shit?" I nodded a bit, watching how gentle Minhyuk was with him.

"It's refreshing to see someone else watching over him. He really likes you," I smiled. Soon enough, the smile faded. "Clearly better than Bri-" I didn't wanna say his name anymore. This time Jooheon heard me beginning to say it and he winced.

Minhyuk's phone began to ring. "What now, Jae?" He asked. It fell silent for a moment. "You what? Fuck you. No, why the fuck are you calling me?" Minhyuk walked out and I quickly ran to hold Jooheon's hand. "No, you bitch! You just took my life away from me. My fucking daughter is the last thing I have of Neveah and you're just gonna take her from m-" I heard him break down into tears. "Fuck you, Jae... Fuck you, man. You didn't have to do that to me. I trusted you and I told you, I'm not fucking dead yet! You fucker... You absolutely fucker. Go to hell, Jae. And if you hurt my kittle girl, I swear to God." It went quiet for a little bit longer before Minhyuk screamed out again. "How am I fucking abusing her, Jae? You're only doing this because you know what I do. And you think I'm sick enough to bring that home to her. You think I'm gonna do something to her... Bitch, tell me I'm fucking lying!" His screaming had Jooheon panic a bit. I leaned down to his ear and began singing a song that we often played around the whorehouse when it was just us around. It was called the Seal Lullaby. It generally never failed to calm him down if we played it before he just fell apart.

Minhyuk walked back in, pushing me away from Jooheon, resuming his spot. "I-I was at 'the moon looks go find us at rest,' if you wanna pick it back up."

He nodded softly, beginning to sing. "In hollows that wrestle between... Where billow meets billow. Their soft be thy pillow..." I sat down by the door, keeping quiet. The doctor was long gone and the lights were dimmed in the room. Jooheon had finally made it to a peaceful sleep and we sat in an awkward silence. It became an unspoken rule to not talk about Jae. And as I saw Jooheon cuddle up to Minhyuk, I watched as Minhyuk began to cry. 

Half an hour later, we had visitors. Kihyun and Shownu. Kihyun was slowly becoming even more livid. "Why are you crying, Minhyuk?" He asked.

Minhyuk looked up to make eye contact with him. And the tears quickly fell again. "I lost my fucking daughter."


	17. × seventeen ×

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kihyun confronts Brian.

Red. I saw nothing but red. I understood why Minhyuk had the biggest anxiety attack at work. I understood why he broke down after after finding out that his ex had an STD, worried he had it because Wonho's new boyfriend was a customer. I understood it all now.

As I pulled up to Brian's house, I jumped out, taking my gun with me. I knocked on the door. "Brian, open up!" I yelled. "I need to talk to you."

Within a few moments, Brian opened the door. "What do you want? I have company." I shook my head. I refused to let another person fall victim to this ring.  
I ran upstairs to where he normally kept his "company", ignoring his yells behind me. I opened the door and saw a kid, couldn't be more than 19. He had dark brown hair, with some hints of silver in it. He seemed scared to begin with.

I reached my hand out to him. "What's your name?" I asked softly.

"L-Lee Chan. My friends c-call me Dino," he mumbled, looking behind me. "He's right there..."

I nodded, holding him closely. "That pussy doesn't fucking scare me. Let's go, okay? I want you to go outside and get in that car there. Trust me, I'm not gonna hurt you. There's another guy there, he'll explain everything okay?" I needed him to trust me.

Dino shook his head. "N-No... That's how I ended up here!" He began getting hysterical. "No! I'm not going with you. I-I won't do it!" He backed away from me and i groaned slightly.

As I turned around, the room began to spin as that kid's scream was heard from behind. Brian decided he could fucking punch me. Despite my dizziness, I retalliated and threw a punch back, hitting him in the jaw. "Oh, you son of a bitch!" Brian growled.

I kicked his leg out from under him, causing him to fall. I quickly straddled him, choking him. "You! You were supposed to tell me when shit went wrong! You knew I hired him, didn't you? You knew who that man was, didn't you? Why the fuck wouldn't you tell me about him? Huh?!" I let go of Brian to keep him from dying on me.

"Oh please, that group of sluts love that shit," he chuckled. "That one over there would too."

I punched him extremely hard. "No more, Brian. No fucking more!" Brian tried to reach for my arms. That's when I drew my gun out, placing it under his jaw. "You don't wanna do that, Bri... You don't wanna even fucking try." I caught Dino standing by in peripheral vision. "Kid, either go outside and get in that car or stay here like a stupid son of a bitch. Your fucking choice." I glanced up to see him rushing downstairs. "Now you, tell me every single time Hyungwon has ever fucking paid you. I know damn well he didn't pay me. I never even knew he did business with us." Brian just began laughing.

He stared me in my eye. "He's been a loyal customer for about six months now. And I knew about every single time. And how Minhyuk jumped at the chance to fuck him. Go question your personal whore instead of coming after me."

I shook my head. "Let me guess, he wanted to fuck with the younger ones, didn't he?" Brian nodded. "And Minhyuk wasn't gonna let him," I growled.

"He got to Jooheon and Taeyong alright. And they were perfect for him."

I began to get even angrier. "Jooheon is legally disabled, you fucker! I highly doubt he consented to any of this. I wanted him out before you even began to drag him into this. I told you he could live with me. Why the fuck are you like this?" I got up, not wanting to be near him anymore.

I began to leave when suddenly, my gun was ripped from my hands and I was grabbed, clutched against Brian's chest. He grabbed my face, my gun resting on my temple. "You got more lip for me, Kihyun? Huh? Bitch, you know I own you just as much as I own the rest of those sluts you're trying to save." He tightened his arm around my throat, effectively cutting off my air supply. "Who are you, Robin Hood? I own you, I own your business. And it sounds like you're about to faceplant on that end of your life." He got closer to my ear, if that was even possible. "Since you're going downhill from there, I won't make you put your ass up. This time." Brian let go of me and threw my gun to the floor. "Talk to me like that or threaten my life again... Oh, I'll make a mockery of you. I make all of those bitches watch you crumble under me. They all look up to you. Imagine their disappointment when they watch their saviour submit." 

My skin was burning with anger and humiliation already. "What's it gonna take for you to leave them alone?" I was gonna do anything for them. I was even tired of this shit. 

Brian sat and thought for a bit. "If I'm losing them? You'll just have to be my on-call whore." I felt my breath hitch in my throat.

I didn't want to. But I wanted them out as soon as possible. "If I replace all four of them... Will everything continue as normal? My business stays together, I'm not homeless... Will you keep funding me? I'll still be doing what you want."

Brian chuckled a bit. "Depends on Irene's sexual harassment claims. But sure, I'll keep doing what I have been. Just let me use you when I need you." Brian grabbed a joint from his little chest on his coffee table. "Now," he coughed a bit as he lit it and inhaled some smoke. "Get the fuck out of my house, bitch." He didn't have to tell me twice.

I ran downstairs and outside, getting in my car. "Dino, where do you belong kid?" I asked, pulling out of the driveway.

"I-I live about twenty minutes away. I needed a ride and I asked that guy. And he entered my address in the GPS, but turned it off before he was supposed to exit the highway. And he came here instead." He was word vomiting, nervous and scared that I'd do the same thing. "I have a little sister... Her name is Ari... When we lived abroad, her name was April, because she was born in April."

I took a deep breath. "Kid, I'm not that guy in there, okay? I-I'm not gonna force you into the dark side or kill you or anything. April will have her brother. I'm not gonna hurt you." It was a quiet ride to his place as I thought about everything that just happened.

Minhyuk smiled at Dino as we pulled up. "We'll wait for you to get inside. And call me if you ever need anything." After Dino left and said goodbye, Minhyuk turned to me. "You walked in there big balls and all, you walked outta there with your dick in your hand. What happened?" 

I turned and looked at him, rolling my eyes as I pulled off, heading back to the hospital. "Nothing that concerns you." I got back on the highway, leaning my head in my left hand, driving with my right.

"Bullshit," Minhyuk chuckled. "I'm not gonna let him do anything to the younger ones, so if there's something I need to do, I will." He was nice and all but he was also annoying to my current state of humilated irritability.

I changed lanes before speaking. "That's cute and all," I said. "But this is my mess and it's what I have to do to save you guys. Focus on saving your fucking daughter, something you could probably control."

It didn't register what I said until Minhyuk scoffed. "To think I actually began to give a fuck about you. Don't fucking bring ny daughter up like that. She's so close to being the system's daughter. Shut your fucking mouth." I sighed softly, effectively creating another quiet ride.

When I parked the car, Minhyuk immediately got out, rushing inside jusy to get away from me. I locked my car up heading inside. First, I had to check on Taeyong, then Jooheon. "Excuse me, can you tell me what room Lee Taeyong's in?" I asked softly. After getting his room number, I thanked the secretary, walking until I saw Shownu standing in front of a room.

"Tae, stop acting like a fucking child," he scolded. "You're going to rehab." Oh shit, he opened that can of worms...

I walked up to him. "You don't yell at him like that," I said, going into the room. "Hey, Tae... So, I know that's scary for you, but you need it. Brian's not gonna be an issue anymore and I know you want out. So, let's get you out." Taeyong cried into my lap as he slowly accepted what had to be done.

After dealing with him and getting him to sleep, I heard yelling from above us. If Shownu and I heard it, I knew damn well that entire third floor above us heard it. I tucked Taeyong in bed and we made our way upstairs. "It sounds like Minhyuk," Shownu said.

I nodded, "I know it is. I hear him talking to Jae." When we got upstairs, Minhyuk was with Jooheon, holding him in bed. Changkyun was sitting at the end of the bed and Minhyuk was crying. "Why are you crying, Minhyuk?" I asked, knowing the answer already and getting pissed off immediately.

He looked up at me a bit before laying his head back down. Those six words that broke not only his heart, but everyone's heart. Especially mine. "I just lost my fucking daughter." I held my head down, tears quickly coming to my own eyes. "Everything I fucking do, everything I've ever done, it's all been for her." His heartbreak wasn't concealed at all. "I didn't do any of this because I liked it. And I know the only reason I don't have her now is because I'm like this. He called a social worker and the social worker said that this was enough to take her from me. And he's forcing a power of attorney until I get myself together. I have no choice anymore. And I have no means to fight. Because the only thing they'll ever remember about me is that I'm a fucking prostitute. And that Jae never was." He hadn't stopped crying at all. I looked up to see Jooheon stir softly. "Shit, sorry... Sorry Honey, I didn't mean to wake you," Minhyuk sniffled, quickly pulling himself together.

Jooheon frowned a bit, wiping his tears away. "Min-Min, no cry..." Jooheon mumbled, nestling closer to him.

That simple act was enough to start me and Minhyuk crying again. Minhyuk, because Jooheon probably reminded him of Sariyah, me because he was such a sweet soul, stuck in an unfortunate situation. All of them were. "Okay, sweetheart. I'll stop crying." Minhyuk ran his hand through Jooheon's hair, lulling him back to sleep. "Shit guys, what am I gonna do? I'm gonna lose her for good. And when she's a teenager and I meet her, she'll be either on a bad path, blaming me for it all, or she'll turn out great, but turn away from me completely the moment I tell her about what I did to lose her. And it's all been to keep her. And she's all I have left of Neveah. And it's gone."

I shook my head, wiping my tears. "She'll be back to you, I swear. I fucking swear to you, you'll have your daughter back. You, Changkyun will have an education. Jooheon, he'll have whatever therapy he needs, Taeyong will have rehab. Everyone will have what they need." I took a deep breath, feeling nausea take over me.

"And what about you?" Changkyun asked. "What about what you need?" 

I shook my head, not worried about what I needed in tbe long run. I placed my hand on my chest, trying to physically supress my nausea, but nothing but pain followed after it. When the room started spinning and my breath got shorter, followed by my staggering, I quickly became alarmed. But it all came out slurred and eerily calm. "I-I need a fucking doctor..." I felt my eyes roll back as I gasped for another breath. I felt my body being caught by Shownu and a gasp from Changkyun. The only thing I was worried about, despite my fainting episode was anyone waking Jooheon up and sending him into another panic. Minhyuk read my damn near unconscious mind, asking no one to scream. My throat closed up as I kept trying to breathe until I just stopped trying.


	18. | eighteen |

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys face a harsh reality.

As soon as Kihyun fall, I saw Changkyun begin to scream. "Shh, don't scream. I got it, don't look." I reached above my head, pressing Jooheon's call button. I glanced over to see Kihyun begin to shake. Changkyun tortured himself by looking at him. "Fucking stop watching! You can't watch this again. Shownu, get him on his side and rub his back." Changkyun hid his head in his lap as Shownu tried to comfort Kihyun. After about 40 seconds, he stopped moving and that's when the doctor came in.

"What happened?" The doctor asked, leaning down to take Kihyun's place.

The doctor's voice was loud and he began to wake Jooheon again. I readjusted him in ny arms, keeping him closer to me. "He grabbed at his chest and he couldn't breathe before he passed out. I think he's having a heart attack."

The doctor looked at me like I was stupid. "He's most definitely under 30, that's a very low possibility." I glared at him, sighing a bit.

As he continued to check him, he called into the hall for more help. "Do you guys just not understand how stress or mental illnesses affect the body? Or are you oblivious?" I asked. "Doesn't matter if someone's 30 or 13, you can have a fucking heart attack. Just fucking help him."  

The doctor got him out of the room and Shownu went to accompany him. After a while, Changkyun cleared his throat, wiping his tears. "D-Do you want to eat?" He asked, calmly.

I shook my head. "Come lay w-with him though." I began to slip out of bed, letting Changkyun take my place next to Jooheon. I began to walk away, heading out of the room.

"Where are you going?" He asked.

I turned around and sighed. "I'm just going to the bathroom." I just wanted to move around.

He called after me again. "What if he wakes up?"

I reached in my pocket. "FaceTime me, let him watch me." Changkyun nodded, letting me go.

I went to the bathroom and locked the door. I needed time to have a breakdown. My heart hurt as the tears started again. "Veya..." I whispered, looking up. "Baby, I'm so sorry... I don't wanna leave her. I tried." I reached in my pocket, grabbing my blade. "I-I don't know how much longer I can be without you. I know I can't leave her. You left us and I don't know what more I can fucking do. Please... Help me, please." Neveah was my life line at this point. For the relief, I went ahead and started with a small slit. I placed the blade on my side, dragging quickly. I did it so fast, yet so deep. I didn't realize so much blood would rise to the surface. And I couldn't stop myself, as always. 

I was about 38 slits in before my phone rang. It was Changkyun. I dropped my blade in the sink and sat on the floor. I answered the phone, pulling my shirt down. My sides hurt really bad but I hid it as well as I could. "Honey, look, it's Min-Min." Jooheon wouldn't look. "Jooheon, he's right there, look."

It hurt me to see him cry. He hated being without me. "Oh hush thee... My baby," I began to sing the Seal Lullaby to him. "The night is behind us. And black are the waters that sparkled so green." He began to calm down a bit and finally looked up at the camera. I smiled softly to him. "The moon o'er the combers looks downward to find us at rest in hollows that rustle between. Where billow meets billow, there soft be thy pillow." Jooheon stopped crying, smiling as he listened to the sound of my voice. "Ah weary flipperling curl at thy ease. The storm shall not wake thee, nor shark over take thee. Asleep in the arms of the slow swinging seas. Asleep in the arms... Sing with me, Honey." Changkyun looked at me, prepared to sing while Jooheon hummed. "Of the slow swinging seas." Together, we finished the song with the oohs sung after.

"Min-Min..." Jooheon mumbled. "Come back."

I sighed softly. "Give me five minutes okay? Go ahead and pick a song and I'll be there before it ends, okay?" Jooheon took it under some consideration before agreeing. Changkyun hung up and I sighed, getting up and checking the floor. There wasn't any blood at all, plus one for me. I grabbed some of the bandaging I stole from a cart on the way to the bathroom, securing it with tape. After covering my sides up, I put my shirt down, grabbed my blade and left the bathroom. 

I rushed back to Jooheon's room and the song was about halfway done. "Look who it is," Changkyun smiled. 

I took my place back, letting Jooheon cuddle up to me. He wrapped his arms around my sides, pressing on the fresh wounds. I bit my lip, suppressing the pain. He furrowed his eyebrows, noticing how I was reacting. "Hurt?" He asked softly. "You hurt?"

I shook my head. "No, sweetheart, I'm fine." I lied and it was a terrible lie. And I felt terrible for lying to him. But he didn't need to know that much about me.

Shownu walked into the room shortly after, looking at us all. "Kihyun's alright, for now. Minhyuk was right, that stupid fuck had a heart attack." He paused a bit before speaking again. "And... You're all getting tested tonight."

Changkyun raised his eyebrow. "What? Why?" Shownu was hesitant.

My jaw dropped slightly. "No fucking way... Who is it?" I felt sick to my stomach.

"I can't tell you guys that much. The doctors don't want you guys alarmed. But Kihyun mentioned how you needed testing. Each of you. So, you're all getting tested soon. And unfortunately, Minhyuk..." Shownu looked between me and Jooheon.

I sighed a bit. "Okay, Jooheon... This is what's gonna happen okay?" Jooheon looked down at the zipper of my jacket, playing with it. "You're gonna have to get blood drawn... Without me or Yunnie by your side." I felt his body tense up. "Hey, no, it's okay. We'll be back soon. We just can't be in the same room. It'll be easy to mix up our tests."

Jooheon whined softly, "Why?" He asked, pulling me closer. He grabbed me by my fucking sides again.

I hissed a bit. "We might be sick. And they don't want to tell one of us we're sick when we're not, while the one who really is sick is told they aren't. You see?"

He nodded, pulling on my sides again. This time, he did it repeatedly. "This? What's this?" Jooheon pulled my right bandage off. Fuck, fuck, fuck. "Why? Don't..." He knew what I'd done.

"What's going on?" Changkyun asked. "Honey, talk to me."

Jooheon looked at me. "Min-Min hurt." I had to get up. Now that it's a real possibility that one of us has an STD, I didn't want any part of me to touch Jooheon. He'd had enough, he didn't need a death sentence.

"Fucking knew it," Changkyun rolled his eyes. "What was the point of doing that you fucking idiot? That's not getting your daughter back, stupid ass." And just like that, anger ignited within me.

I walked up to him and slapped him. "I'm real motherfucking tired of y'all throwing my daughter back  fucking face."

Jooheon whimpered. "No yell!" He screamed, covering his ears. "I'm sorry!" He began to cry, not yet panicking.

Shownu approached Jooheon. "Hey, I won't yell. Is it okay if I hold your hand?" Jooheon sniffled, taking his hand. "I'll stay with you. Minhyuk, go find the redhead, Changkyun, go find the blonde."

I left the room, looking for the doctor. When I met her, I smiled softly. "This will take less than five minutes, follow me." We headed to the room she wanted to test me in, walking silently. She asked me multiple questions about ny sex life as she began ny tests. When she got to the last one, I sighed in defeat. "Have you ever had sex with a person in exchange for money, drugs or alcohol?" She asked.

I nodded slowly. "Yes," I admitted. 

"You seem like you're afraid to admit it." The doctor finished my blood draw, pressing down on my vein.

I shrugged a bit. "I... I kinda am. That kind of information lost me my child."

She smiled softly at me. "You have a kid? What's their name?" She was so nice? For no reason...

"Uhm, her name is Sariyah." I thought about it for a bit. "Her mother was head over heels for that name."

The doctor tied the cotton ball to my arm, smiling softly. "I have a son... His name is Hansol... And, I'm only making this conversation because I get it." She started testing my blood. "A teen mother doesn't just get through med school by herself. I was in the same situation as you. I don't ever judge anyone who answers yes to that question." It fell silent for a but. "I'm Dr. Seo Hyewon... Sorry for not introducing myself earlier..." Her smile was radiant.

"I'm Minhyuk, but you knew that." My leg began to shake, anxious for the results.

Dr. Seo analyzed everything pretty quickly. "You are clean, Minhyuk. There's not a trace of any STD whatsoever."

The knowledge was a weight off my chest. "Oh my God..." I whispered, melting into tears. It was both a good feeling and a bad one. "For as many times as I slept with him... Wait, I haven't in a while." I began to think. I quickly thanked Dr. Seo before rushing back to the room. Jooheon was sleeping peacefully without anyone. Changkyun was just staring at his lap. "Someone tell me their fucking results... Now."

Shownu looked at me, sitting back in his chair. "Jooheon's undetectable," he sighed.

"The fuck is that supposed to mean?" I looked at Changkyun, praying he'd tell me no. "Chankyun... Please."

He looked up at me. "No. I don't have it." Immediately after, he put his head down. 

"Shownu, please tell me Tae's result. Please." I was begging at this point.

Changkyun cut him off before he could deny me. "He's also undetectable. I don't know Kihyun's."

It was both a blessing and a curse that Jooheon and Taeyong were undetectable. That means neither of them were confirmed to have it. But, that didn't save them either.


	19. × nineteen ×

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kihyun makes progress since his heart attack.

It had been a week since everyone had been tested, since my fucking heart attack and since I'd signed a deal with the devil. And he wanted me. Shownu took it upon himself to teach Changkyun while Minhyuk took care of Jooheon and tried to find a lawyer.

When I pulled up into Brian's house again, I let every guard of mine down. I'd chosen this. "I don't have time to bother with the preliminary shit. Just do what you're supposed to." Brian grabbed me by my shirt, stripping me down to nothingness. And I let him. While I turned myself off, I thought about the boys I was doing it for.

He had me for about three hours before he finally let me go. As I got in my car, I began to cry. "Fuck..." I winced, crying my eyes out. And then, laughter followed. Extreme, psychotic laughter. "Fuck you, bitch." 

When I pulled out of the driveway, I decided to go to my office to discuss the lawsuit against me. My lawyer came in to talk with me. "Yoo Kihyun? We have to stop meeting like this." Ms. Sohyun laughed softly, shaking my hand as a courtesy. "I'd love for you to meet me over coffee for once, not a lawsuit." I laughed slightly in return.

"Well, if people would stop attacking me for having a slight disagreement, I'd be all for having a coffee date. But you also have a girlfriend. Don't think I forgot." I grabbed the summons I'd received, passing it over to her 

Sohyun smiled a bit. "Jihyun wouldn't mind, we aren't even supposed to be together, you know that. Anyway..." She read the document. "Wait... This is Irene? Your fucking girlfriend?"

I nodded. "Sure is. And she's doing this because I've practically fallen out of love with her. And she's deadset on me doing so because of Sammy." I ran my hand through my hair quickly.

"Then she has no case on you. You guys have been sexually involved, resulting in a child, there's not much harassment going on there." Sohyun sat the paper down. "She didn't complain until now, and the fact that you're falling for someone else is enough to show that she's just envious. If you put a name to that person as well, it'll win your case quicker."

I thought about it a bit. "Lee Minhyuk... A man. What would that do for me?" I asked.

"Ooh, I'm not the only gaybie, am I now?" Sohyun chuckled softly. "Uhm, yeah... That will get people questioning. If you come out, it'll show your disinterest in pursuing her even more. But come out because you want to." I smiled a bit at her. We shook hands and parted ways for the day.

As I began to pack up, Hyungwon came in to deliver my mail. I couldn't look at him, whatsoever. I decided press record on my phone as I received it. "Thank you, Hyungwon." I smiled, going through it quickly.

"Ready to go babe?" Irene walked in, grabbing Hyungwon's hand.

I furrowed my eyebrows. "You two? For real?" I asked.

Irene nodded. "That's right, he's mine." She kissed him softly. She was one oblivious bitch.

"Hmm," I nodded. "That's strange, I swear you were just begging me to come back to you a couple weeks ago."

She shook her head. "That was before you blew me off because I couldn't carry Sammy for as long as I was supposed to. Before you fell for someone else. And I'm going to make you pay." With that, Irene and Hyungwon left. Thank God, I recorded that.

I packed up for the day and went home, ready to go to sleep per Minhyuk's directive. Him and Shownu tried to keep me on my toes about keeping away from stress. I was in my late twenties and I'd already had a heart attack. As soon as I walked in, Minhyuk hugged me. "I'm drawing you a bath. And I'm changing your sheets. Jooheon's getting so much better. He can be by himself and not panic as bad as he used to." I smiled softly.

"Thank you, but... I want you to come upstairs with me. Real quick." Minhyuk nodded, letting me lead him up to my room. As soon as the door closed, I kissed him passionately as I leaned him against the door.

Minhyuk chuckled, pulling away quickly. "What's that for?" 

I sighed a bit, taking in all of his features. "I love you. I love you, Lee Minhyuk, I love you. You're so beautiful and kind and you don't deserve how life has treated you so far." My hands slid under his shirt, rubbing his sides. "You're perfect and you don't need to do this anymore." His scars were raised slightly and it saddened me to feel them.

Minhyuk wrapped his arms around my neck. "Took you long enough, stupid ass." He kissed me slowly, pulling me closer to him. 

Things began to move so fast. I had him down on my bed, kissing him all over. Then, I had to come back to reality. "Wait, stop!" I yelled, a bit louder than intended.

"What?" Minhyuk asked scared.

I had to come up with an excuse. "G-go turn off the bath water. I think it could be overflowing." With that, Minhyuk ran out of the room. When I later heard yelling and Minhyuk didn't return, I could only assume Jooheon was struggling with something. I took that opportunity to take some medicine and slip away to take my bath. 

I was so tired and at the same time, worried for Irene. If she was going to be abused... Or even worse, if she had sex with Hyungwon... I'd really have to kill him. He had the nerve to show up in my office and smile in my face as well. He hurt everyone I cared about. But also, I worried about why Hyungwon moved onto Irene. It was just too coincidental.


	20. 》 twenty 《

I had no more motivation for learning, and I think Shownu knew it. I only did it because it was the only way Kihyun would keep me around. Anything was better than sleeping with anyone. Never again would I ever sleep with someone. Never. Celibacy was my choice for the rest of my life.

It made me quite sad, honestly. I'd imagined myself with a spouse and kids. I knew I wouldn't have that. It wasn't in my deck of cards. But I never wanted to talk this out with anyone. Shownu just made it so damn easy to open up to. "Hey," he asked, closing my textbook. "You're not Changkyun. The fireball I know you can be. You haven't been for two weeks. What gives?"

It's been two weeks since Kihyun had a heart attack, also known as the day my life crashed and burned for fucking good. I looked at his honest eyes and broke into tears. "This is worthless. Pointless! I can't do anything in my fucking life. I know I'll be dead almost as soon as I graduate from college." I laid my head down in my hands.

"Why?" Shownu asked. "You aren't planning on killing yourself are you?" I shook my head.

For two weeks, I'd put it out of ny head. Even denied it the moment it happened. But gloom followed me as I went with that damn doctor. I looked up at him. "I-I have it..." I whispered. "I have the STD, it was me. And we still don't know about Taeyong or Jooheon. My guess is that they have it too." 

Shownu looked at me with such... Concern and shock. "I thought you said you didn't." He seemed heartbroken with me.

I shook my head. "I lied to Minhyuk... Because it was clear he didn't have it. And there was no reason to tell him." I thought for a bit. "I honestly wish he did fucking have it. I needed one good thing in my goddamn life. And he's trying to end his any fucking way. Why'd I have to be the one?" I looked down in my lap. "He literally slept with that guy to save us. He put himself through torture to save us. And he came out unscathed. If I have it, then Jooheon and Taeyong probably do too. And their young lives will end with mine." Shownu pulled me into a hug.

"You wish no one had it," he said. "You're emotional, you have every right to be. But you know Minhyuk would probably go out and even the score for you guys. He's stupid like that. That's why you didn't tell him either." 

He was probably right. But I had too much anger in my heart to even listen to him. "It's a shame too. I'm 18 years old, I know now that I'm free. As free as a caged fucking bird." I turned and looked at Shownu, gazing up at him. "But wow, how I so desperately wanted to get to know you. And get closer to you." My hand began to run against his arm. "Thank you for teaching me. And then some." Shownu began to chuckle a bit.

Then he realized I was serious. "Changkyun..." He said, looking me in my eyes. "To be honest, that dream doesn't have to be over." His response shocked me. He wasn't afraid of me?

"You know just as well as I do that condoms break." Shownu just shrugged. 

He smiled softly. "I wouldn't mind it, seriously. But I wouldn't do you while you're vulnerable like this."

I leaned in to kiss him when the door opened. "Goddamn it," I groaned, slouching back into the couch.

Kihyun walked in glaring at me. "Well, good to see you too?" He laughed. "Sohyun's gonna take over as Minhyuk's lawyer as well. Where is he? I wanna tell him."

Shownu shrugged. "Last I checked, he was upstairs in your guys' room? Is that a thing? A shared bedroom?"

I chuckled a bit. "You two might as well call it that. He puts Jooheon in the guest room next to that room while you both sleep there. Maybe do something else." I winked his way.

"No, none of that going on here." He laughed. "Dear Lord, if our lives were an online fanfiction, I feel like our writer would be tired of writing almost smut scenes." Kihyun went upstairs to go look for Minhyuk.

I decided to open my textbook up again. "Do I really have to write this essay?" I asked. Shownu nodded, handing me an outline sheet.

"Fill that out first. It'll help organize your thoughts." I nodded, beginning to write on it.

My thinking was interrupted by Kihyun screaming. "Oh my God!" Shownu and I looked up to see if he would come to the landing. "Call 911, please! He's not waking up!"

Shownu jumped up and ran upstairs. I rolled my eyes, now irritated again. Proof that Minhyuk was trying to end his life anyway. He deserved this fucking death sentence. I got up, going to call. "Medical. We have a 24 year old male unconscious here. The owner of this house found him, I haven't gone up to look at him. So I don't know whether he overdosed or if he just won't wake up." I twisted the phone cord in my hand, anxiously waiting for them to send someone. "He's attempted suicide before, I wouldn't doubt it if it was another. Okay, thank you." I hung up, going back to the living room. "They're on the way, Kihyun. Were there any pills up there? Or his blade?" I asked.

"No!" Kihyun yelled. "It doesn't look like suicide, he just won't wake up!" 

My eyes widened in a sense of urgency, running upstairs to look. Shownu was going CPR to the best of his abilities. "There's not a note or anything?" I began to look through the drawers.

"I'm telling you, Changkyun, he's just not waking up. There's no pulse." Kihyun held his wrist, checking to see if he had anything going for him as Shownu did compressions. "Hah, hah, hah, hah. Stayin' alive, stayin' alive." Kihyun kept singing as Shownu matched the rhythm. They continued as paramedics arrived.

As the medics left, I felt terrible. I basically called it upon him. What was wrong with me?


	21. × | twenty-one | ×

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kihyun finds out what happened to Minhyuk; Minhyuk finds out what's been happening to Wonho and Sariyah

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter mentions child abuse.

I paced the waiting room, waiting for the doctors to come tell me what was wrong with Minhyuk. He didn't attempt suicide, I knew it this time. I was so anxious, but I had to keep my stress levels under control. I had a strong heart that had been so strong for so long that it began to weaken. If I stressed too much, I'd be at high risk for another heart attack. Yeah, let's just believe that one.

"Is anyone here for a Lee Minhyuk? Minhyuk Lee?" A doctor called out. I walked to her. "Hi, hello. I'm Dr. Seo Hyewon. Sorry, I wasn't quite sure how to announce his name."

I shook my head. "It's fine. We often switch our names..." She led me back to a private room. "Uhm, not to be impatient, but is he fine?" I fiddled with my fingers, nervously.

She sighed softly. "Well, is he going to die? No, he's stable. But he's not perfectly okay." Dr. Seo offered me a seat at the table, walking to the other side of the table. "We found that he has Cheyne–Stokes respiration. And it's an abnormal pattern of breathing characterized by progressively deeper, and sometimes faster, breathing followed by a gradual decrease that results in an apnea. So he'll be breathing deeply and or quickly and then suddenly stop. He can come back from it, or he can lose a lot of oxygen and completely pass out, which is what happened." I sighed softly, running my hand through my head.

"Okay, so he just needs a CPAP machine or something?" I asked, looking her in the eye. There was more to what happened. I stopped her prematurely.

She nodded, "For that, yes. But there's another part." She pulled out a scan. "We ran scans and we found this," she circled an area on the scan.

I looked closely. "Is that what I think it is?" I asked.

"If that is a tumor, then yes." She showed another scan. "We think its been growing for a few years. At least three, maybe up to five. This tumor looks like it's benign, perfectly clean margins. It's in his prefrontal cortex, the area that affects his decision making, his emotions, his personality. Almost everything that makes Minhyuk... Well, Minhyuk, is affected by that cortex, and in turn, by that tumor." Dr. Seo sighed softly, allowing me to look at the scans.

It took me a while to speak. "So... His self harm decisions. His decision to prostitute. His anger at a snap? All of that... Is caused by that tumor?" I began to cry. He'd gone through more pain and suffering due to the tumor.

Dr. Seo nodded. "Yeah, that's basically it. Minhyuk might be a completely different person without it. But you have to talk to him and convince him to have the surgery. It's a fairly easy surgery and recovery will be quick. And with these medical records, he can probably get Sariyah back... I tested him for the STD like you said and he came up clean. So I knew he at least had a daughter."

I surveyed the option in front of me. I only had one. Anything else would be cruel.  "Is he awake? Or able to be woken up?" Dr. Seo nodded, leading me to his room.

× | × | × 

I woke up to a hospital room. What the hell happened? I looked around sleepily to see Kihyun sitting in the corner. "Hey," I smiled softly. "Come here."

Kihyun smiled standing up quickly. "How do you feel?" He asked, holding my hand.

"I feel fine. Why am I here?" I asked, looking around. Kihyun pulled up a chair to sit with me.

The look on his face was concerning. "You have Cheyne-Stokes respiration. It's a type of sleep apnea. And you wouldn't wake up when I came to wake you. I actually got Sohyun to fight your case. We're gonna get Sariyah back." I smiled widely, but Kihyun didn't reciprocate it, which worried me. "Minhyuk, another thing though... I don't know how to tell you, so I'll just... Say it. And show it." He pulled out a scan, holding it up to light.

I looked closer at it. "What is that?" I asked.

"Have you had major headaches recently?" I nodded softly. "That is a tumor. In your prefrontal cortex. It controls your... Your decisions. Anything that makes you who you are. And it's gotta come out."

I furrowed my eyebrows. "What... How long has that been growing?" I asked.

Kihyun shrugged. "I was told at least three years. Up to five." He shrugged. "Tell me about your last year with Neveah. Please." He asked.

I thought back to it. "I forgot a lot of things back then. I was stressed about being a father, and I just... Forgot simple things like what time the store closed. Neveah's cravings were very simple as well, but I forgot where to get them. Like ice cream? She really liked Brahm's strawberry ice cream and I'd go to Baskin Robbins, not because it was open and Brahm's wasn't. I just knew her favorite had a B in it." I just began thinking about the little things. For Christmas, she got me a key finder because I was always losing my keys. But I'd put them in the same place every day. I'd forget to mark down Sariyah's temperature, how much she ate, things like that. Neveah would stay up with me just to monitor those things. D-Did I help drive her crazy?" I asked, tears coming to my eyes.

"No, baby... You didn't." Kihyun took my hand again, wiping my tears away. "You didn't drive her crazy. But the memory loss was a symptom. That tumor's been with you for five years." Shortly after, Kihyun got a phone call.

I furrowed my eyebrows. "Who is that?" I asked.

Kihyun shook his head. "Brian..." He answered it, putting the phone on speaker. "What?" He snapped.

"I oughta kill you," Brian yelled. "You fucked me over, Kihyun. I can get you arrested for homicide."

I was confused. How in the fuck could he do that? Kihyun was unbothered, leaning back. "Shouldn't have fucked with me. I was done. I was going legit. I can get you arrested for prostituting, drug dealing, rape, abuse, a couple counts of murder." I watched Kihyun look down at his phone before piping up at the next comment.

Brian screamed at him. "I'm gonna fucking die now, dickhead! You gave me a fucking disease, you fucking bitch."

Kihyun looked up at me. He hadn't told me. He quickly hung up. "Minhyuk," he started.

I shook my head. "You have it too?" I asked, tears falling. "Who else has it? Am I the only one who doesn't have it?" 

Kihyun sighed softly. "At this point, yes. And I'm sorry I didn't tell you." He took my hand. "It's why I decided not to sleep with you the other night..." I looked at him, thinking about Wonho when he said that. 

"Hand me my phone..." I asked softly. Kihyun reached into my bag and handed it to me. I dialed Wonho, suddenly worried about him.

Wonho answered quickly. "H-Hello?" I didn't like his response. 

I furrowed my eyebrows. "Wonnie? Are you okay?"

"Y-Yeah, Ma... I'm okay." He was in trouble.

I shook my head, muting myself. "Go to Wonho's house. Now. I'll text you the address. Just fucking get there." Kihyun looked at me crazily. "Hyungwon's hurting him. He's lying on the phone."

I put my phone on speaker. "Hyungwon! I'm talking to my mom, I swear. Please stop. Not around my mom... She doesn't deserve to know this." I looked up at Kihyun, tears brimming my eyes.

"His mom passed away a year ago. I'm the only who knows that. He's lying to him." I unmuted the phone and began to speak in a higher pitched voice matched with broken English. Just in case Wonho had put me on speaker to prove it to Hyungwon. I just hoped it was convincing enough. 

Wonho sighed softly. "Ma, I'm going to be gone for a while... It's okay though. Just a little vacation. Okay?" I looked up at Kihyun, muting myself again.

Kihyun was stunned. "Fucking go already!" I yelled. 

"Are you going to do the surgery?" Kihyun asked, getting up.

I glared at him. "Fuck the surgery. If Wonho dies, I refuse to get a fucking surgery."

Kihyun rolled his eyes. "Impulsive ass decisions... You want Sariyah back or what?" He asked.

I instantly felt small. "I- Just get him out of there. And I'll have the surgery the moment he's safe. Tell them to schedule me." Kihyun gave a kiss on the head as he left.

I was scared for him, Wonho... Hell, even Hyungwon. And when I least expected it, Jae walked into my room. "Minhyuk," Jae said softly.

I shook my head. "I don't wanna talk to you. You took my baby away from me. And all that's wrong with me is the fact that I have a fucking tumor."

Jae walked closer to me. "Min, something's wrong with Sariyah." Those words stabbed me in my chest. 

"Wh-What the fuck do you mean?" I took out my IV, standing up.

I got out of bed, walking past him, leaving the room. "I-I..."

I sharply turned around and pinned him to the wall. "You took her away from me? Then you hurt her?!" I screamed. "I swear to God, Jae... You tell me right the fuck now what happened to her!" I was so close to killing him.

Jae began to cry. "My girl... She burned her."

My eyes widened as I pushed up on his throat. "How? How the fuck did she burn her? And fucking why?" Jae was going to die tonight too. The entire world could fucking die for all I cared. My baby was hurt. 

"She... She took her curling iron rod and... And burned her. She was annoying her she said." There was no excuse.

A doctor finally came to come between us. "She is five years old! She's supposed to be annoying! What else happened to her? What, did someone molest her too? I swear to God, I'll wring your fucking neck! You fucking bitch!"

Jae shook his head. "I love that little girl, Minhyuk!" He yelled in defense.

"Wonho would love her more... Hell fucking Kihyun would love her more! And I lost her because I slept with men for money?" I leaned against the opposite wall. "But your bitch can fucking burn my baby girl? What else happened to her? And you better tell me the goddamn motherfucking truth." Jae refused to look at me as he spoke.

I felt my chest rip apart. My breathing got heavier. "I'm sorry... You're not wrong. But I didn't do it! I swear. I let her watch her for the day while I did Christmas shopping for her... And I came back to Sariyah crying as she went to sleep."

I shook my head, grabbing at my chest. "I-I-I h-hate you..." I began to cry as I slid down the wall, screaming in tears. "I hate you! I hate you, Jae, I swear to God I fucking hate you!" I held myself as I cried. Jae tried to come comfort me. "You touch me, I'll fucking kill you, you piece of fucking shit!" I began to hyperventilate more, waving at the doctor. She had me lay down as she put a mask over my face, slowly sedating me.


	22. × twenty-two ×

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kihyun takes Minhyuk's directive and attempts to save Wonho.

I rushed over to Wonho's house, racing against the clock to save him. That's how Minhyuk would explain it. If it wasn't for Minhyuk, I wouldn't even be here. And I truly doubt death was waiting for him. Nonetheless, I was here, going to save him.

As soon as I got to his house, I knocked on the door. I knew I couldn't be heard. From the porch, I heard both Hyungwon and Wonho screaming at each other. Well, Hyungwon was screaming at Wonho, Wonho was just pleading for his mercy. "Please!" Wonho screamed. "Please, I love you I swear I do, don't do this!"

I heard Wonho scream out again, crying following after. "We're both fucking dying, you idiot! I'm gonna die, you're gonna die, I oughta just put us out of our misery..." There was a pause. "That way, I'll be your last. I'll be your last and you'll have no one else but me." I began searching the plants in front for a spare key. I had to get in.

"Hyungwon, I-I can't... Please." Wonho cried. "You've taken everything from me already, can you please just let me keep what's left of my life?" He was clearly terrified and exhausted.

I heard something break. "Fine. You want to live? You wanna fucking live." Hyungwon chuckled. "Live without me? That's what you fucking want? Fine."

Wonho screamed out as I found the key. "No! Oh my God, Hyungwon stop! Don't!" I unlocked the door, coming in quickly. Immediately, I was faced with Hyungwon and a gun.

"The fuck are you doing here?" He asked, pointing the gun at me. 

I looked between the both of them. "Wonho," I said softly. "Go get your things." 

Hyungwon chuckled. "That bitch is staying right the fuck here. It's time for you to go." I looked at Hyungwon.

I shrugged my shoulders, walking up to Hyungwon. I let my forehead rest against the barrel of the gun. "Go for it, kid. I'm losing my life, I'm losing my business, I'm losing my body, I'm losing my sanity. I have nothing left to lose." Hyungwon stayed perfectly still. "But you wanna know something?" I asked.

"What?" Hyungwon growled lowly.

I chuckled softly. "When someone has nothing left to lose..." I got quieter. "That's when you should be scared." I looked up at his eyes, hoping he could see the exhausted wrath in mine. 

We stood there for a moment. "Kihyun, you're a weak dick motherfucker," Hyungwon scoffed. "You're not gonna do shit to me. I've got nothing to lose either, those were some big fucking words you attempted to use."

"You were gonna kill yourself before I walked in," I said. "You tried to commit a murder-suicide, maybe so Wonho wouldn't get you any help. But then you gave up because your boyfriend told you he wanted to live. And you were gonna stand right fucking here and kill yourself right in front of him." I had him there. He visibly froze up, twitching softly.

Wonho whimpered from behind him. "Kihyun, please don't. Don't, I'm begging you, please." I looked up to see him in his entirety. He was completely beaten down, tears covering his face, bruises and cuts everywhere. 

"Don't what, Wonho?" I asked. "Don't fucking convince him to kill himself? Don't convince this piece of shit to end it all?" He took a gasping breath, trying to stop his crying. "Look at yourself in the mirror. Right there." I watched him turn around and look.

Wonho let out another sob. "Oh God," he whispered. "I-I don't even recognize myself." He looked closer. It was in that moment I knew that Wonho was quickly breaking down.

I looked at Hyungwon. "Why do you really wanna kill yourself, huh?" I asked. "It's not regret for beating Wonho's ass. Almost killing him a few times. I've read messages. And if that was the case, you'd have been long gone. And it's not regret for taking my girlfriend away from me. Not regret for giving young boys a death sentence, or abusing these boys and exploiting them past their already more than willing exposure." Hyungwon was shaking. I was calling all of his bluffs. "You just wanted to attempt to scare Wonho into staying with you. And he's not doing that." I began to walk to Wonho. "Go. Get. Your things." I pushed him toward the stairs.

"I love him," Hyungwon said, tears pouring down his face. "I love him so much."

I shook my head, laughing. "You love him so much... Yeah, so much that you'd beat his ass during the day, sleep with Irene in the evening, basically rape people in the night and still... You sleep at night. You go to bed and wake up, ready to do it all again." I began to hysterical myself. "How old are you, Hyungwon? I'm guess you're like 22 years old?" I asked.

Hyungwon nodded. "Yeah, almost 23." He said.

"I'm 23 and I just had a fucking heart attack." I admitted, not caring about him knowing my weaknesses. "I'm high risk for another one and instead of saving my boys, I'm here screaming at you, praying you'd get some goddamn sense and leave that one upstairs alone, leave mine alone." I took a deep breath as I felt my chest flutter. "How'd you get it?" I asked.

He just froze up a bit. He didn't say anything. Then he finally admitted it. "Brian has a second ring. Girls. I was with one of them and she got it from someone and it's just a damn cycle."

I rolled my eyes. "What's wrong with the two you have? You have someone who really loves you. Wants you. Cheated on someone for you. He left a family for you. And you put your fucking hands on him." I shook my head. "He's buff, he's big and muscly. But his heart is so soft and he is so sweet. And you know it. And that's why you wanna use him. If he's ever talked about his ex's little girl... You want to detach him from Minhyuk. Ruin who he is. The fact of the matter is, Sariyah's gonna be so happy when she sees Wonho. You can't tear him and Minhyuk apart. I can't even do that. And now? He's gonna die because of you. And if he dies before you, it's gonna drive you fucking insane." I started to walk upstairs. "But you love him." I got to the top of the stairs, watching Wonho struggle to get his things. "Dude, just grab your phone, electronics, whatever work you have and let's go." I helped him quickly. I knew we had to move quickly. Hyungwon was still downstairs, armed and dangerous. The moment he got out of his pissy pussy feelings, he'd begin shooting.

In less than three minutes, Wonho was rushing outside to my car. "Hyungwo-"

I pushed him toward the door. "Don't even speak to him, just go!" Wonho made it out. And as soon I walked out behind him a shot rang out. I kept walking as Wonho screamed out. "Go! Keep fucking going!" We rushed to the car. Another rang out. "Fuck!" I ducked down behind my car, opening the back door and throwing Wonho's shit back there, along with pushing him in. I quickly jumped in the front, speeding away. 

"Oh my God!" Wonho screamed. He flashed his arm up quickly. "There's blood!" 

I looked back quickly. "Wipe your arm." I waited for a minute. "Is there any more running down your arm?" I asked. I looked through my rear view mirror to see Wonho shake his head. I nodded softly, driving to the hospital. "You're gonna go get checked okay?" He nodded again. Even though I cruised to the hospital, I got there in record time.

As we got out, I told Wonho to go check in, telling them that he was with me. When I stood up, I turned around to grab my phone off of the floor. I glanced around to see that my white leather had a dark splotch on it. And a dark streak to the floor. The silver Mercedes-Benz logo plate on the edge of my car, right under the door was tinted a darker color. I grabbed my phone and walked into the hospital. Wonho was heading to the ER when he turned and saw me. "Kihyun?" He asked.

I cocked my head toward him and I saw Dr. Seo. "Kihyun? What's going on?" She turned away from Wonho, coming to meet me. But she seemed to walk a lot... Surely, I had moved closer to her myself.

I looked down, a recognizable shock coming through to me. "I've been shot..." I mumbled. Wonho rushed over to me, holding me up while Dr. Seo grabbed a wheelchair. 

"Sit down, Kihyun." I tried to, my body quickly falling into the wheelchair. "Do you believe in God, Kihyun?" 

I grew up conservative. My head nodded softly as a tear fell. "But I don't think he believes in me." The pain in my hip started to grow.

Dr. Seo sighed softly, walking slowly and calmly before noticing my conscious state fading in and out. "Regardless, we're gonna start praying. All of us, are gonna start praying." Her words slurred together in my perception. "Kihyun, pray until you can't even think to pray anymore. Pray until God calls your name." I tried to nod, but my head just fell down, my breathing growing heavier and heavier.


	23. | twenty-three |

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Minhyuk tries to protect Wonho and worries about Kihyun.

I sighed softly, waiting for some confirmation that Wonho and Kihyun were safe. I decided to text Wonho, telling him what room I was in, hoping he would come upstairs. I looked at the time. A few hours before my surgery. I blatantly refused to go under until Wonho and Kihyun were safe. After waiting for a while, I was greeted by a panicked Wonho, rushing to my bedside. "Minhyuk," he whimpered. "I- He... Kihyun..."

I sat up quickly. "Shh," I mumbled. "What's wrong?" I asked, grabbing onto him as he leaned down to cry into my chest.

"Hyungwon... He did all of this to me. A-And look." He leaned his head down. I gasped softly, running my fingertips over the patch of baldness he had left behind. "We got into this huge fight and then... He tried to kill us both. And I didn't want to die. Not yet. I know I will but I don't want to die yet. And he was ready to kill himself in front of me as Kihyun came in. And he wouldn't let us just go! He had to shoot at us as we left." Shooting and hysterics didn't blend well... "And there was blood on me as we left but I wasn't hurt... And, God I'm sorry!" Wonho cried.

I shook my head. "Where's Kihyun? Tell me... Please," I mumbled.

"Hyungwon shot him... I-I think it was his side or his hip. But he's shot. He's in the OR now, Dr. Seo had him pray..."

I began shaking inside. "K-Kihyun doesn't pray... Please don't tell me he's dead." I begged, holding onto him tightly. 

Wonho shook his head. "He just passed out, but he's not dead. I-I wish it was me. I wish I would've been shot. He didn't know. He walked in here looking like he'd just seen a ghost. H-He didn't know!"

I sighed softly, fighting my own upset. "I need fucking surgery and I told them I wouldn't until you were both here, safe and by my side." I felt sick to my stomach.

"What?" Wonho asked. "Why do you need surgery?"

I pointed to the scan on the wall. "Tumor. It's pushing on my frontal cortex. It's why I make rash decisions." I sighed a bit. "Why is everything so fucked?" I looked at Wonho, holding his face in my hand. "But you're okay now, he can't hurt you anymore." A ding from his phone rang out.

He smiled at me softly, sniffling, before his face fell. "No!" He screamed throwing his phone away from him. "Oh, God!" I furrowed my eyebrows, grabbing his phone, trying to calm him down.

"Oh my fucking God," I whispered. It was a video of Hyungwon, self harming. He was crying. It was all an attempt to get Wonho to come back. "Cover your ears..." Wonho nodded, looking down in his lap, covering his ears.

I turned up the volume to hear what this psychopath had to say. "Please, baby I'm so sorry. Does this make you feel better or any happier? I've hurt you so much and now I'm hurting. I'm sorry, please come back. I need you. Please. Please." Then his eyes rolled back into his head as he passed out quickly. He regained consciousness about 10 seconds later. "What the fuck..." He mumbled, stopping the video. "Wonho?" I tapped his knee, not trying to scare him or trigger him. "Honey, get that wheelchair for me. Come on." Wonho whimpered softly, sniffling. He helped me shift to it and I sighed softly. He started pushing me out into the hall. "No, go back in the room. I got it okay?" He nodded hesitantly. I wheeled myself down to the bathroom, locking myself in. 

I dialed Hyungwon from Wonho's phone. He picked up immediately. "Hi baby! I'm so sorry, come back to me okay? W-We can get away from all of this and everyone. Please."

I began laughing. "You absolute Jackass," I chuckled softly, trying to kill my laughter. "Wonho will never be with yiu again for as long as he lives." Hyungwon reciprocated the laugh.

"Which isn't for long." Anger boiled through me. "And the same for your precious boy toy friends. And... Oh, what is that guy? Oh yeah, the man that couldn't care any less about you. The man who sold you repeatedly. You think he loves you as much as you lust after him? You got issues, my guy."

I rolled my eyes. "Who has more issues? A prostitute or a psychopath who has a lethal disease and purposefully infects people with it? You can be charged with at least three counts of murder, and three counts of attempted murder. The moment your victims die from it, you're finished." His laugh was haunting, chilling me to my bones.

He stopped for a moment. "How's your daughter?"

I began to shake with anger. "She's none of your concern." He was slowly breaking down my front.

"But, he's my boyfriend's concern?" He knew a lot more than I expected, honestly.

I began to feel faint. I was getting too upset. "Don't contact Wonho ever again. He's fine away from you. Go to hell."

Hyungwon sighed, "Meanwhile, I'll always know where he is, and he'll always come back to me. You can try... But he'll always remember what he's seen." With that, I hung up. I couldn't take anymore. I got myself out of the bathroom, wheeling myself back to my room. 

There, I felt my body fail me even more. Jae was there, talking to Wonho. "Get the fuck out!" I screamed, rushing into the room. "You're no longer allowed to be anywhere around me!"

Wonho furrowed his eyebrows. "What happened?" He asked softly, helping me to the bed.

"That son of a bitch took Sariyah from me. And then he let his whore ass girlfriend hurt her. But I'm the misfit parent." Jae went to speak before Dr. Seo came in. 

She sighed. "First of all, you aren't allowed to be around him anymore, please leave." She ushered Jae out before talking to me. "Okay, Minhyuk. We've gotta go. The sooner this bad boy's out, the sooner you'll be better off."

I shook my head. "Not until I know Kihyun's okay. He was fucking shot. And why are you here, taking me to surgery? Why aren't you helping him?" Dr. Seo took my hand.

"Kihyun's with the best doctor for him. I know general surgery, but I know neuro better. He's being taken care of. But he wants you taken care of as well. Let me take you on up to surgery. When you get back, he'll be waiting for you okay?" She was an expert at convincing. I nodded softly, taking a deep breath and laying back. 

Wonho smiled softly at me, taking my hand. "Thank you, Minhyuk. We'll see you soon, okay?" 

I nodded, looking down at my arm, nervous about going into surgery without Kihyun. "Dr. Seo?" I asked softly as we made our way to the OR. "Please, don't let me die." I had so much to live for now, to fight for especially. I couldn't die.

"That's not my intention," she smiled, putting ne under. "See you soon buddy."


	24. 》twenty-four《

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Changkyun has a conversation with Wonho while waiting for Kihyun and Minhyuk to recover. When Kihyun and Minhyuk wake up, things slowly take a turn for the worst.

Panic filled all of my senses. Minhyuk's in surgery with a tumor, Kihyun's in surgery with a gunshot wound, Minhyuk's sweetheart of an ex is terrified to even exist and I'm dying. I'm fucking dying. Only 18 years old, and I'm dying. 

Shownu's with me and Wonho, waiting in the room that Minhyuk and Kihyun will both share once they make it to recovery and I can tell he's struggling to keep up with both Wonho's emotions and mine. I was slowly falling deeper and deeper into a panic attack. "Hey," Shownu mumbled softly, taking my hand. "Everything's gonna be alright, Changkyun. Look, there's a doctor coming to talk to us right now." I looked up to verify what I was being told.

The doctor had a kind smiled on his face. "Kihyun did greater, he's headed up to his room now. He's got a pelvic fracture going on, specifically his ball joint. He's not going to be walking on it for a while, just long enough for it to heal up. He's on oxycodone as well to help with pain."

I smiled softly, my anxieties melting away. Dr. Seo made her way out, smiling widely. "That lil 1 ain't ain't bothering anyone anymore. We successfully and completely resected the tumor." She was so happy.

Tears came to my eyes. "You got it? The whole thing? You got the whole goddamn thing?" I stood up, over joyed that they were okay.

"The whole goddamn thing," Dr. Seo smiled softly. "You want to go up and wait for them to wake up?"

I nodded softly, Shownu also getting up to follow me with Jooheon. We headed up to their room, both of them sleeping soundly. "Thank you so much," I smiled at Dr. Seo. She smiled back, telling us she'd come check on them later. 

Wonho was there, just as happy to see them. "Hi, uhm... Who's Changkyun?" He asked. I made myself known. "Uhm... I-I know Hyu... My boyfriend's been around you guys before." I nodded softly, anxiety rushing through me again. Shownu qnoticed and kept me close. "I just wanted to know... Not exactly how bad it was... but, yeah. Pretty much that. I just wanted to apologize that such terrible things happened to you guys."

I reached out a hand for him. He was confused but took it anyway. I slowly pulled him into a hug and felt him shake. I felt awful for him as well. He didn't know I was just giving him a hug in return and he was actually afraid of me, an 18 year old boy, hurting him. "Thank you for your concern." I pulled out of the hug, taking his hands. "But are you okay? We only had to deal with him ever so often. You? You loved him, lived with him." I began to rub my thumbs across the backs of his hands, showing him a calmer and tamer human interaction.

"I still love him somewhere in here..." Wonho admitted. "I don't want to. I shouldn't." It fell silent for a bit before he broke down crying. "Fuck, he makes me feel so gross, so wrong, he hurts me. But for some reason, the good times try to outweigh the bad. When he's nice to me, he's this perfect angel. When he's not, he's Satan. And my heart is too compassionate. Just like probably everyone in this room, he's had it rough.  An-"

I cut him off. "Wonho, I don't give a damn about his life story. Minhyuk lost his wife to suicide and his daughter to CPS and her godfather. And she was treated like this. Kihyun, lost his son because he was born too early, worked to build his business with damn near nothing. Grew up with no one practically. Felt into the wrong life, he's trying to fix it now, he has a heart attack, gets shot and has an STD he'll die from. My dad wasn't ever around for me, my mom would date these guys and they'd use me as a punching bag when a drug deal went wrong. And she just said there was nothing she could do. We'd lose our place to stay, and she loved them oh so fucking much. I can't be bothered to consider Hyungwon's own troubling life. You shouldn't either. I know you have past hurt. You think he fixes it, he doesn't. You're better off without him." Wonho didn't know how to respond.

"He's right," I heard a pained groan reply. "You're better off without him. And I didn't get shot just for you to go back to him." I turned around quickly, tears coming to my eyes.

Wonho let go of me as I rushed to Kihyun's bedside. "Kihyun!" I smiled, prepared to hug him.

"Other side!" He said quickly. "This side hurts like hell." I nodded, walking to the right side of the bed. "How you been, champ?" He asked nonchalantly.

I glared at him. "For some reason, I'm the only one who hasn't cracked up completely yet, ending up in the hospital."

Shownu coughed, gaining our attention. "I resent that." He chuckled.

Kihyun laughed a bit. "Oh, Minhyuk." He said looking behind me. "He actually did it?"

Wonho nodded. "But something happened while you were gone... Saving me." That piqued Kihyun's curiosity.

"And what was that?" He asked.

I bit my lip. "It's better for Minhyuk to tell you."

Minhyuk stirred slightly. "Tell him what?" He asked. We all looked toward him. "Where am I?" He sat up, rubbing his face. "Where's Sariyah?" Nothing out of the ordinary thus far.

Wonho decided to speak up again. "Uhm, Minhyuk? Don't you remember?" 

Minhyuk crunched his eyebrows down, trying to think. "Oh! Of course." He didn't sound upset. That was red flag number one. "Neveah has her, they're probably at the park." I glanced around to see Kihyun and Wonho riddled with shock. I just happened to "lean" on the emergency call button.

Dr. Seo came in immediately and she was faced with a unanimous statement by me, Wonho and Kihyun. "What the hell did you guys do to Minhyuk?!"


End file.
